Compelled By The Moon

Chapter 19

Chapter 19

Amy's POV

Tiredly, I watch the cold rain fall heavily from the heavens. The sound of the water hitting the ground and trees, bouncing off the roof was soothing my racing thoughts. There were no other sounds in the forest, the animals were still and silent as the rain plummeted from the sky.

Wrapping my arms around myself and pulling my blanket closer, I watch my breath come out in a swirling mist. Winter must be drawing closer. The nights are getting colder and the days slowly becoming shorter. It will become easier for the hunters to find us if it snows.

Days have passed since Mike came to see me in my room. He had left with the other Lycans the following day. I remembered falling asleep and waking up to discover they had left.

I was disappointed. I had formed a plan in my head. I thought over what Harry had told me and I wanted to apologize for the way I had behaved. I was going to start afresh and finally try to let someone in. But when they left, I became an empty shell.

He left me.

He left me here alone, with a broken heart.

I wanted to curse him out, to hit him. To do anything that will tell him how much I loathed him. But my heart refused to comply. I was unable to fight the bond anymore. No part of me could dislike him, despite how much I tried.

I won't lie, I wanted him. I needed him. But now, I feel like I'm nothing without him. I was familiar with this feeling. It was the same as when I found out that mother had died. I couldn't handle the heartbreak.

Yet here I am, another person has left me. I really should have learned my lesson by now. Trust nobody. Everyone will just leave you behind.

When Mike had left, I completely shut everyone out. I barely ate, barely slept. I rarely left my room. I was numb to the world. I just wanted him back. He had no idea of the state he had left me in.

Sighing, I turned to go back inside. Looking back at the rain once more, I crept back inside the pack house. Making sure to lock the door behind me, I slipped out of my shoes and slowly wandered my way back to my room.

I was a mess. I was aware of that. I knew well of the concern most of the pack had for me but I couldn't bring myself to aid their concern and soothe their worries. Instead, I kept my distance from everyone. I was isolating myself from everyone, just like I did when I had first arrived here.

After climbing into my bed, I lay there completely awake. I couldn't think of anything. My wolf had been quiet and was acting as though she were in mourning. She had been like that since we found out Mike had left.

I watched as seconds turned into minutes, and minutes turned into hours. Soon, it was already morning and the house was becoming alive once again. I rolled over and curled up into a ball, hugging my knees to my chest.

Why am I so lost?

I began to grow annoyed with just laying here. I was annoyed with myself. I can't just mope around forever. There is a possibility that he will never back and this is just his way of rejecting me.

Kicking my covers off, I crawled out of bed and into the bathroom. I looked at my reflection and was not surprised with the person staring back.

Her eyes were dull and lifeless, they held no shine or emotion. Dark circles were boldly evident under her eyes. The dark hair no longer shined or moved fluidly like water either. Her skin was so incredibly pale, it was nearly translucent and was hollowed out.

The girl who looked back at me reminded me of an anorexic, insomniac patient on a mental ward who has just lost her fight. Then I was reminded that this is what I looked like. This is who I appear to my pack.