Impractical Jokers One Shots

Three men, one girl and your baby

"Do you remember when you guys punished me by acting as a parentin' know it all?" Joe asked Alice and the guys. They were shooting at a TV studios for a punishment and as Joe was the only joker with no thumbs down for this episode, Alice and the others were the losers.

"Yeah." Q said.

"You're gonna be parentin' know it nothings." Joe grinned.

All of them looked confused at Joe. "Explain." Sal said.

"Well you four are gonna be presenting a new TV show called Three men, One girl and your baby. And there's an audience of moms out there with their kids that you're gonna show the latest buggies and usual baby things to."

"Live? On air?" Alice asked, starting to panic. She loved kids and the boys were great with them but presenting to experienced parents was a whole other thing.

"Yeah!" Joe grinned. "Oh trust me you're gonna love it."

"Why does that give me a bad feelin'?" Sal quipped.

After being fitted with ear pieces, the guys and Alice waited behind a door with Joe in another room watching them on the monitor.

"I don't like kids." Q said to them. Which Alice had to bite her tongue at because she knew how good he was young kids both on and off the show.

"I'm so not ready for this." Sal said.

"Guys you're on! Have fun!" Joe cried through their ear pieces, making Alice wince at the loudness of his voice. Oh great Joe was getting hyper.

Baring a grin, Alice trooped out with the guys. There were harsh spotlights and audience full of moms and babies. It made her shudder.

Taking their places behind a table, they smiled.

"Hey everyone. I'm Brian, this is James, Alice and Salvatore and you're watching Three men, One girl and your Baby." Q said.

The audience clapped and let out approving cheers as Murray, Alice and Sal waved. Then they froze unsure of what to do.

"Sal read off the cue screen." Joe said.

Sal turned to the monitor that was to their right. "Let's start with something that needs to be done a lot everyday... changin' -"

Sal broke off with a sheepish grin. Alice smirked. Sal hated anything gross and he always carried a bottle of Purel for emergencies if he couldn't get to a sink.

"A baby's diaper." He finished, tapping the table nervously.

"Q, you're up." Joe prompted.

Q smiled nervously. "And I'm about to show you its not that hard. Now who wants to lend a baby?" He made his way from the table and ambled out to the audience, lifting his arms as he did so. A young woman in the front row held out her baby.

"Aww hey sweetheart." Q cooed as he took her in his arms. Alice nearly swooned at the picture but knowing Joe and Murr would notice it, stayed stoic.

"Alright." Q buckled a little under the weight of the baby but regained his composure and brought it onto the stage, lying it down.

"What's it's name?" Q asked and Alice let out a small giggle, earning her a strange look from another mom.

"What's it's name!" Joe cackled in her ear.

"Leola." The mom answered.

"Leola." Q noted then set to changing her.

"Reverse engineer it." Murr suggested as Q struggled to get the dirty diaper.

"I'm on it." He took it off then held it to them. "Alright, get rid of that."

Alice and Murr immediately backed up, leaving Sal to take the diaper. Alice grinned as he looked unamused, holding it at arms length.

"And then we put this on, yeah. Nice and dry." Q said as he unwrapped a new diaper.

"You would get rid of this normally." Sal said flatly, searching around for a bin. Then shooting a look at both Alice and Murr who shook their heads. He rolled his eyes.

"Sals got nowhere to put the diaper!" Joe roared with laughter. "The expression on his face is a mixture of confusion and disgust."

Q stepped back to admire his handiwork. Alice gaped as they took in the wrongly applied diaper.

"You put it on the wrong way." Murr said.

"You know what, let's go with that's good enough." Sal interjected as Alice caught the shocked expressions of the audience.

"Boom! That was easy." Q added, shooting a grin to the audience. Alice rolled her eyes affectionately.

"Next up is the top baby carriers." Q announced. Two carriers were brought on and both Sal and Q put them on.

"Right you just fasten it here like that." Q said as he clicked the fasteners together. "Now James and Alice, bring on those babies."

Alice and Murr smiled as they walked up to two women who held their babies up.

"Hey sweetie, what's your name?" Alice cooed as she took a gurgling baby girl in her arms, stumbling a little under the weight.

"Her name's Erin." The mom smiled.

"Aww that's a really lovely name." Alice grinned. "Thank you." She headed back towards Q who was waiting on stage with Sal. She passed by Murr who was trying to fit a baby into Sal's carrier.

"Ready, Q?" She asked as she held Erin up to slot her into the vest.

Q looked nervous. "Uh sure." He replied, his voice breaking slightly.

Alice smiled and put Erin into the carrier.

"I think he should face me." Sal said as the baby Murr was trying to get out of the carrier started to cry.

"Oh." Murr swiftly but gently pulled the baby out of the carrier and headed back to the audience. "There's baby Logan."

Alice took Erin back to her mom and then resumed her place on the stage.

"Now for the buggies. James, would you fetch one please?" Alice asked, reading off her cue.

Murr went to grab a buggie that was standing in the corner by the crew and came back with it.

"We're gonna teach you how to fold one of these." Sal said as Murr set to work but quickly found difficulty

"He just put the brake on!" Joe cackled.

"Uh we fold so many of these, it's hard to keep track of how every one folds." Sal said.

"Yeah we're literally folding a hundred a day." Alice added.

They watched as Murr continued to struggle with the buggie. Alice gasped as he put his hand on a thin bar that connected one of the wheels to the buggie.

"Oh you mother-!" Murr cursed as he caught a finger in the catch.

"Hold on ill be right there." Joe spoke into the ear piece.

Alice looked to the left as Joe jogged out, headset still on and started folding the buggy. She was amazed at how fast he was and effortless.

"This is Joe, our show manager. He's a dad too so he knows more about these things than us." Alice explained as Joe folded if onto the floor.

"Oh it's the new model!" Q realised. Joe nodded, waved at his handiwork then left.

"We're there men, one girl and your baby. And remember, boom! That was easy!" Murr grinned at the audience.

"Next week tune in as we'll be teaching your babies how to swim." Q said as the audience recoiled and shot them weirded out looks.

"Well I think that went well." Joe said.

"Payback is yours, Gatto. You got us." Alice admitted, shrugging in defeat.