Mafia Betrayal

Chapter Three

Charlotte

I almost didn't pick up the phone when she called.

We just talked a few days ago and it still wasn't safe for us to be in contact that often. If I didn't have that sinking feeling in my stomach that something was wrong, I might have just let it go straight to voicemail.

"So you'll come?" My mom asked, her voice weepy and tired. I wondered how many times she had this same conversation over the last few days, recounting what the doctors told her and spouting off rehearsed details about the funeral and reception.

"Of course we'll be there, mom." I assured her, biting back my tears as best I could. 

Josh couldn't be gone. It was only a few months ago that they were here visiting, and he was completely healthy. Running along the sand and chasing waves with Layla, grilling burgers on our back patio, laughing with my mom over a glass of red wine, doing some ridiculous dance during a game of charades. It wasn't fair.

He was so young. Way too young for a heart attack. My whole world felt like it was crumbling around me. Josh was my father, and the very best one I could ever imagine. He video chatted with us every Sunday night and read Layla bedtime stories, he walked me through fixing the leaky faucet or changing the oil in my car by myself. He was my rock, always supporting me and loving me when he didn't have to. He was everything to me, to Layla, to my mother. To Noah. God, I could only imagine what he was going through right now.

"I'm so glad, Char. I don't even know where to begin with the funeral arrangements. It just happened so fast; it was so sudden. We should have had this figured out but I never imagined..." She dissolved into sobs again and I had to wipe my own tears off of my cheek.

"Please don't worry about any of that, mom. We'll take care of it when I get there. Everything is going to be okay. We'll be there first thing in the morning." Having a plan gave me the slightest bit of relief. If I had something else to focus on, I could distract myself from the overwhelming grief and guilt I was feeling.

"See you tomorrow, Char. Please travel safely. I love you."

"I love you, too." I bit my lip, trying my best not to break down on the phone with her. I knew that was the last thing she needed right now. When I hung up the phone, it was eery how much more empty our world felt now. Even hundreds of miles away, I could already start to feel his loss. Thank God, Layla was asleep. I didn't think I'd be able to put on a happy face for her right now.

I sat down on the couch and put my head in my hands, unable to hold it in any longer. We'd lost so much time over the last few years, and now he would never see Layla grow up. It wasn't fair, nothing about our situation was fair.

I couldn't help but think that I had robbed Layla of so much in her short little life. She deserved to have her grandparents and uncle in her life, she deserved her father in her life, but I made my choice a long time ago. That didn't mean I didn't question it everyday.

After walking away from Antonio that day, I felt more lost than I'd ever been in my life. Even worse than when I found out he and my brothers were alive. I had this beautiful life growing inside of me and my emotions were wild, and he forbid me to tell Luca and threw cash at the problem.

Antonio didn't have all the blame, though, because I made my own choices that day. I could have gone to New York. I could have found some other way to contact Luca, but I didn't.  After hearing what Antonio had to say, I decided to stay away. There were too many unknowns, and even though I knew Luca wasn't like Antonio, the possibility was overwhelming. What if? What if something changed? What if he changed? What if Antonio was right? Could I live with myself if I went back to him and something happened to her?