Your POV
JD and I sit on our bed wondering what to do until finally I decide to prank call them. "Hi, Kurt? This is y/n. Yeah, I didn't expect to be calling either. I guess my emotions took over. I was wondering if you wanted all those things you've been saying to really happen. It's always been a fantasy of mine to have two guys at once" JD starts cackling and I throw a pillow at him to shut him up. "Yeah, in the woods behind the school at dawn. Don't forget Ram!" I hang up amazed at what I just did. JD hands me a gun.
"I don't see the point of writing a suicide note if we're just going to shoot them with blanks" I say.
"Well we're not going to be using blanks this time" JD says. I look at him confused. I am NOT killing anyone every again.
"You can't be serious. Listen, my Bonnie and Clyde days are over" I move over to get out of my bed. JD grabs my arm and pulls me back.
"Wait a second, do you take German?"
"French"
"Alright, these are Ich Luge bullets. My grandfather got a shitload of them back in WWII. They're like tranquilizers only they break the surface of the skin enough to cause a little blood but no real damage" JD says, knowingly.
"So it looks like the person's been shot and killed and really they're just lying there bleeding and unconscious?" I ask. JD nods.
"See if we shoot Kurt and Ram, make it look like they shot each other and by the time they regain consciousness, they'll be he laughing stocks of the whole school. The note's the punchline" JD informs.
I grab my notebook and start to jot down the note in Kurt's handwriting..
Ram and I died the day we realized we could never reveal our forbidden love to an uncaring and ununderstanding world. The joy we shared in each other's arms was greater than any touchdown. Yet we were forced to live the life of sexist, beer guzzling, jock assholes.
"It's perfect!" JD exclaims. "Now let's see some of the homosexual artifacts I dug up to plant at the scene. I got an issue of Stud Puppy, a candy dish, a Joan Crawford postcard, some mascara, and the most perfecto thing I picked up-mineral water!" He says with a devilish smirk on his face.
"Oh come on, a lot of people drink mineral water! It's come a long way!" I tell JD.
"Yeah, but this is Ohio. I mean if you don't have a brewski in your hand, you might as well be wearing a dress" JD says.
"Oh, you're so smart" I say as I stand up to kiss JD.
