Passenger | Unedited Version

chapter fifteen | i wish you would

chapter fifteen | i wish you would

"I need your help, Miss Mariam."

"Is it with your shoes, darlin'? Because those ratty old florescent green flip flops aren't doing your outfit any favors, not that your outfit is even doing itself a favor. Who wears khaki shorts? All of it should be burned, like don't even donate it to Goodwill; nobody should be cursed with that kind of attire. You look like a hot mess, but without the hot part to that. Do you happen to own a mirror, Eleanora? Because I'm starting to wonder about you."

I have come to realize over the past few years that Miss Mariam is not a morning person. It's actually eleven o'clock on a fine Wednesday morning, but all the lady sees is a dark cloud and never the light at the end of the tunnel. She wakes up a handful of hours before I ever do, so I don't get why she likes to blame me for waking her up. She's such a rude old lady, which is probably the exact kind of person that I really am, even though I'm a good 50 years younger. At least I hate cats, so it's not like I'm destined to be some crazy old cat lady.

"I came over here to ask you for some help planning a surprise party, not to be on America's Next Top Model. You're just going to have to deal with that I'm wearing, as I'm not going all the way back home just to change for you. You should know that by now, ma'am. It doesn't look that bad, anyways." I hate being snappy at her, but I have no choice but to be. I came here for a mission and I'm not leaving until things are settled.

"At least your hair looks really nice like that." That single line is probably the closest thing that I'll ever get to a compliment from Miss Mariam and for that, I'm touched. That's probably also going to be the closest thing that I'll ever get to a proper apology, so her rude words from before are forgiven.

I look down at the two pigtails that I have my hair separated into, both of the trails braided in messy rows that I can't seem to improve, no matter how many times I attempt. I've been wearing my hair more and more like this ever since that one day with Indie, which I've actually grown to love. It doesn't help that Indie blushes whenever she notices my hair this way, which is always a major plus in my book. "Indira likes it when I wear my hair like this. I mean, I think it looks rad. Thanks."

"Just make sure that you wear them because you like the way it looks. You should never just do something only because you want to impress a boy or even a girl, in this situation. You have to do every action in your life solely for yourself, or you'll never get far and never be truly happy. You're Eleanora and no one else should be creating a different version of it just for the heck of it. You know that, right? Just make sure you're doing everything for yourself, okay? It can be really easy to get caught up in a relationship, but you can't let it."

I nod my head to the words that Miss Mariam says, knowing that she's only looking out for me and wants me to be version of me that I can possibly be. That old lady will never stop looking out for me, will she? I'm not doing anything just to impress Indie, although I will admit that she's always in the back of my mind. We'll be fine.

I'll be fine.

I wish I could say that Miss Mariam is looking good too, but something has been up with her lately. She's never been on the unhealthy side of the spectrum, but she's now crossed into it with how thin she is. I also don't think that she's getting much asleep at all, as there always seems to be deep bags around her eyes that never used to be there. Her dark skin has a greenish tint to it these days, which only makes her look worse. I don't know what's wrong with her and I know that she won't appreciate it if I were to put my nose in where it doesn't belong. I'm sure it's nothing, as she would tell me if something was going on. Right?