The Perfect Balance

Chapter Twenty One

Sorry for the long break, I've been working so much. Either way, here's the chapter. :)

"So are you trying to get back with him or are you trying to move on?" Diana asks as she drops down across from me in Panera. She wastes no time dipping her spoon in her soup and taking a noisy sip.

"I don't know," I concur after a few seconds of peering down at my sandwich. "I still like him. I really, really do. But I don't like being in limbo."

"Well, you know he still likes you. He just needs time to focus on himself," Diana replies.

"I know but every time I'm with him, I just want to fall back into our old patterns," I explain with a loud sigh. "It's even worse when we hang out alone. Like last weekend when we were in the car together and we talked. We almost kissed, Di."

"Why didn't you?" she wonders while stirring her food. I force myself back in my spot.

"Sage called," I grunt in slight annoyance. "She apologized profusely when I told her what was happening before she called but I just wish she'd have waited two minutes."

"I think you should kiss him. Maybe it'll knock some sense into him," she suggests as she guides her straw to her mouth. I chew my sandwich, shake my head, and wait to swallow before speaking.

"I think that'll just make things ten times more confusing," I correct her with a disappointed frown.

"Have you guys at least acknowledged the fact that you almost kissed?" she leads while patting the corners of her mouth.

"No! He's just pretending the conversation didn't happen," I retort in a frustrated groan. "I know I'm not saying anything either but I'm not the one that called things off."

We continue to talk about him for the next twenty minutes before we have to head to the bookstore for our shared shift. The car ride is silent and all I can think about is how friendly Diego and I have been this past week. Any onlookers would never guess that not too long ago, we were sneaking around just to be alone for an hour or two.

"Speak of the devil..." Diana pulls me back into conversation as she pulls into the familiar parking lot. My eyes lock on Diego's bike parked a few spots over and Diana lets out a girlish giggle, which gets a small eye roll from me.

I follow her into the bookstore, where Diego's waiting. As of late, he's returned back to our old pattern of him coming in before his shift. I obviously don't mind but we tend to do some light flirting, which doesn't help me at all. I'm too lost in thought to stop myself from colliding with Diana's back when she stops short. "What are you doing, Diana?" I hiss as I step back and attempt to regain my balance. She glances back at me with a slightly horrified look in her face, which halts my growing annoyance. I peer over her shoulder and find Diego having a conversation with the long lost J.D.

I turn to Diana, who stares at me with an expression that matches mine. When they notice our presence, they both fall into an awkward silence, which persists until Diana and I make our way behind the counter. It isn't until I greet them both that conversation picks back up. "Hey..." I greet them awkwardly while clocking in. I feel their gaze on me as I exhale quietly. What a great way to start my shift.

"Hi," J.D. acknowledges once I turn around. We immediately lock eyes and I offer him a small smile, which is clearly forced and uncomfortable. "Long time, no talk."

I want to remind him that it was his decision and then I want to ask why he decided to pop back up. Why is it that, as soon as Diego calls things off, everyone starts coming back into my life. "How have you been?" I ask politely for the sake of small talk. I kind of expected (and anticipated) never talking to him again.