Touch Me (boyxboy)

25. It is what it is

Joel

I'd spent most of the day in the kitchen prepping food for tomorrow. My hands were sore from constantly being in and out of water, and I had one of those sexy blue plasters on my finger from where I'd cut it, instead of a carrot.

My shift was finally over though. And I could go home and sleep.

Duncan, the star that he was, had actually given me tomorrow off. Even though they had drafted in loads of extra staff, many from the Huntley's household, he still insisted I stayed away from the manor for the wedding.

I felt bad, but I also appreciated the gesture. I was going to go in bright and early the day after the wedding to tidy up from the big day.

I stuck my head into my uncle's office.

"I'm off now." I said, "Good luck for tomorrow. I'm sure it'll all go smoothly."

Duncan looked up and smiled at me. He hid it well, but I could see how tired this whole event had made him. My mum kept telling me that he should think about retiring. She was probably right, but I couldn't help but think Duncan and this place were somehow woven together, and that tearing one away from the other would be a bit like pulling two mates apart.

"Thanks Joel," my uncle said, forcing a smile. "It better had go smoothly!"

"It'll be fine, I'm sure. Anyway, I better get going, see you later."

I had just made it out of his office, when I heard my Uncle call my name.

"Yes?" I said, peeking back in.

My uncle was holding a coat out towards me.

"I believe this is yours," he said.

I took it off him and realised that it was mine. It was the one that Casper borrowed and never gave back. My stomach lurched from the thought of him giving this back to my uncle.

I felt kind of hurt that he couldn't have just passed it to me instead.

"Did he say anything?" I asked in a small voice.

Duncan shook his head. "He just asked me to give it back to you."

I nodded.

"Thanks," I said, then left the room.

I walked back in a bit of a daze, just staring at the coat in my hands. It wasn't till I got home and realised how cold I was, that I considered how stupid it was that I hadn't put it on.

I flopped down onto my bed, inadvertently landing on the coat.

My nose caught the scent immediately.

It wasn't strong, but when I buried my nose in it, I could definitely smell him. And boy did he smell good. I just lay there, breathing in and letting the content feeling wash over me.

I woke up a couple of hours later with the coat over my face.

I sat up and lifted if off me, placing it on my lap. As I ran my hands over it, I felt something in the coat pocket.

I couldn't remember leaving anything in it, so I quickly put my hand in and pulled out a small white envelope.

It had my name written in black letters across the front.

I swear my heart missed a beat as I realised what this was. This was a letter from Casper.

I both wanted to, and didn't want to read it in equal measure. These were possibly the last words he would ever say to me, and I was scared. I was scared in case they were angry or hateful words, and I was scared in case they were kind or loving words.