Something Entirely New (Rupphire)

Fixing The Issues

~Sapphire's POV~

I know this is wrong but I want this so much. I want her. I nearly lost her in this stupid ordeal.  She makes me feel so alive. I just want to feel alive.

Her hands trail down to my shorts and slowly slides them off. 

"Should we go to your room?" She asks me while looking up. I only nod my head and rush to my room, leaving her trailing behind me.

She lays me back on the bed and continues to kiss me softly, trailing her way down my face and neck, stopping at my chest. She sits there for a second. Not doing anything.

"Ruby?" She sighs and only to make her way back up. She kisses my lips hard again before sitting up and looking away. I follow and look at her confused. 

"Ruby?"

"I don't want to do this. Not right now. Not our first time."

I stay silent as we both think. 

"We're just trying to distract ourselves." I nod along. She's right. This isn't how it's supposed to feel.

"Sapphire there's nothing I want more than to be able to take you in this bed right now. But we have so much we need to fix first. We need to both be happy with each other and ourselves before we get there." She looks at me waiting for my response. It's not that I'm speechless. I agree with her completely. I just can't seem to form words yet. So I just nod and pull my legs closer to myself.

"I'll go get your clothes and change and then we can put on a movie and just talk. I'll stay the night if you want me to?" I nod again. She takes a moment before she gets up but when she does she crouches in front of me to look under my bangs.

"Are you okay Sapphire?" She asks in the softest whisper. So soft that if you weren't paying attention you'd miss it.

Again I only nod in response. She smiles slightly and gets up, kissing my head before going into the living room. Not soon after I hear the front door close. She's probably just getting her stuff.

What was all that? It's like I'm frozen here in this moment, unable to move. I don't know how I feel. I don't feel sad. Or angry anymore. Kinda just, numb. Like I was before I met Ruby. When was the last time I slept properly? Maybe that's it. Or all the stress. And anxiety.

"Sapphire, I forgot that I left my bag at school. Can I borrow your clothes?" Her voice is still quiet Even hesitant as if the slightest sound might break me. Maybe it would.

I nod again and take the clothes she hands me, dressing myself and attempting to pull my hair back up but fail. I hate having to go to bed with my hair down.

Ruby goes through one of my drawers looking for the clothes she wore last time. She looks into the wrong drawer and I see her face redden before looking in another. The faintest smile forms on my face.

After she dresses I grab my laptop and we lay in bed and put on a random Netflix movie.

"Do you want to go first, Sapphire? I'll just listen and you tell me whats been going on."

I shake my head no. She should talk first. I-I still can't bring myself to speak yet.

"Alright," she sighs and sits up and I follow.

She looks at me lovingly, placing her warm hand on my check and moving my hair out of my face. "You're beautiful Sapphire." She tells me. I smile slightly which makes her grin wide. She's such a goof.

"Here turn around, and I'll braid your hair as we talk okay?" She remembers my pet peeves. She remembers the small things I tell her.

I just nod again and turn as I feel her fingers run through my hair gently. Then she starts.