A Sky Full of Blue

Chapter 4: Ginger is the Color of Her Hair

"Red hair, sir, in my opinion, is dangerous." ~ P. G. Wodehouse

The next day I'm woken up in a similar fashion, with the alarm clock blaring and my brother sitting at the foot of my bed, ready to start the day. He gives me the marigold smile before shoving me lightly, telling me that I need to find the best outfit; the 'friend making' outfit.

He's eager, waiting for me to find my BFF. What if he's wrong? I don't want to make a mistake.

Maybe it's better if I stay in the shadows until I know I'm comfortable with my personality, with the fact that I could be set off at any time.

Toby takes my black high top Converse and decides that he's done his job. He leaves me to find my own outfit, surrendering to my perfectionist ways.

Once I get what I need I'm heading down the steps, skipping number five. I'll have to break that habit. I have to remember: new home, new sounds.

Toby's whistling, tossing an apple into the air, waiting for it to drop into his large hands. He catches me staring at him, and gives me another marigold smile. He'll need to stop that. From now on he'll have to tell me why he's smiling like that.

Because I know that I can't. Not if I don't understand the emotion behind it.

I dance around my brother, grabbing a bowl from the cabinet. It has to be the sunshine yellow bowl. That one's for cereal only.

I grab my favorite cereal, Cinnamon Toast Crunch. I shake the box out of habit, setting it onto the table gently. Once the cereal is in I pour the milk, making sure that the line of it reaches to the ending point of the cereal.

As I spoon it into my mouth Toby talks to me. He's filling the empty space with something to grasp onto, something for me to think while I eat.

"You're going to make a friend today. I can just feel it." I raise an eyebrow at my brother. He's really positive about this. I push my bowl to the side, wiping away the milk mustache that has gathered on my upper lip.

Toby gathers the dirty dishes and tosses them into the sink with a clank. My ears ring, but I don't bother to share the knowledge. I'm just hoping that he hasn't broken our ceramic bowls.

I make sure that my notebook is secure, in a place that only I know, and make my way to the Jeep. Today the sky is a kind of cadet blue, which is darker than a light blue, cloudless sky. I buckle my seatbelt and wait for Toby to hop in.

I have my driver's license, it's just that I don't like the way driving feels. All of my fears come to the surface. You could possibly encounter another driver, get in an accident. While driving during bad weather you can careen off the side of the road, landing so hard that you die from impact alone. The wheel just feels like a death sentence to me. That's why I like Toby driving so much; it's a security thing more than ever.

He turns the music over to me this time, smiling gently. this isn't like his marigold smile at all; it's stifled, as if something is holding it back. Maybe he's nervous for me.

I click the button to my favorite station, turning the volume dial up to an even number. Toby knows better than to touch an even number, especially when I'm in the car. My shoulders relax a little as I listen to the music, drowning out my thoughts and worries for the short ride.

We pull up to the school and my stomach clenches. The soccer team waits for Toby by the door, their eyes pointing directly at the Jeep. I try my best to duck my head, keeping a low profile.

I step out of the Jeep behind Toby, shrinking into his tall figure. I don't want to be seen. In fact, I want to be invisible. At our old school, sure, Toby was popular and he had a lot of friends, but not one of them had ever tried to talk to me.