CHAPTER 5

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They are chasing me. A crowd of people is chasing me and no one wants to help me. I can see my parents, my brothers and my friends. Isn’t that Olamide, Chidubem and Ifeanyi too? Why are they chasing me like I killed someone? I can hear them say different things. You ugly thing! You are an excuse of a daughter. No one will ever love you. No one will ever care about you. I hate you. We all hate you. Just die.

“Are they talking to me? Daddy, why are they yelling at me? What are they saying?” I asked my dad.
Who is your daddy? I hate you. I regret ever bringing you to this world. You are useless to me, why can’t you just die or run away. Go away from our lives, you are a burden to me. Just die.

Everyone starts chanting the last word. Die! Die! Die! Die!  I can see them chasing me again. I start running again as fast as I can so they won’t catch up to me. I run till there is no place to run to. They catch up to me and before I can recall, I get hit with something on my head and I fall on the floor. Kill her. Kill her. Kill her. Someone takes a step closer to me and points a gun at me. I look up to see the person and when I recognize the person behind the gun, I start panicking. Why is Kosi pointing a gun at me? I thought he cares. I am completely baffled and shocked. Kosi! Kosi! I don’t want to die. Don’t kill me. I begged and begged but before I could finish talking, I hear the sound of a trigger going off and immediately feel a huge impact in my chest. I have so many things to say. I try talking but I couldn’t form any words. I can’t say anything. They can’t hear me. I have no words. Black dots start forming in my eye and before I can comprehend what’s happening, I fall into complete darkness.

I wake up panting like I just finished running a five-mile race.

“Kosi” My voice is a breathless whisper. “Why will Kosi shoot me? I thought he cares?”

Of course, he cares. It’s just a dream. My subconscious reminds me.

“It’s just a dream” I chant it over and over again.

I am still shaking from the impact of the dream. Tears are threatening to come and I let them flow freely as I wrap my hands under my knees and start rocking myself back and front. My whole body is trembling as panic and fear course through me. I cry silently till I fall asleep again.

$$$

I wake up after a few minutes of torturous sleep and check the clock beside my bed. I groan loudly when I find out it is still 4am so I have two more hours to myself before I start doing my morning chores. I sit up on the bed and rest my head on the headboard and shut my eyes.

I immediately feel immense pain in my head; my eyes are sticky and swollen from the long hours of crying last night. I crack open my eyes and try to clear my throat but end up coughing violently because of the dryness. I look around my room; my eyes settle on the damp pillow in front of me and just like that the dream comes crashing on me again.

I just want to sleep again and never wake up. I hope to forget that terrible nightmare but it seems so hard to do. It is more terrifying than any other nightmare I have ever had. In the former ones, I never get killed and the most painful part this time is that Kosi was there and he was the one that pulled the trigger on me. I sigh heavily and just try to forget everything at least for now.

Remembering I still have an hour and forty five minutes, I pick up my android from under my pillow and open my offline reading application. I am so happy that my dad agreed to give me back the phone after weeks of begging on the condition that I should only use it for one hour a day and if he ever finds me using it when I am not done reading, he would seize it permanently.

Reading novels is the only thing that keeps me sane. It helps me a lot and provides me comfort when I am emotionally down. Some people say that I am obsessed with it and I agree. Reading is like dreaming with your eyes open. It takes you to another dimension where you are allowed to see things your own way without being judged or criticized for it. It changes your life. Reading unlocks world unknown to man. You are free to create things to your own liking and you can travel through time. It helps you escape the traumas of life and shows you how to be a better human being.

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