Worthless (Camren)

"I'm lucky then.."

When Clara came home from work she found Lauren curled up on the couch, a cup of tea cradled to her chest, staring at the wall.

"Are you okay?" She asked, startling Lauren out of her trance.

"Fine, I'm fine." She checked her lap for spilled tea. "How was work?"

"Oh, work was fine." Lauren watched absentmindedly as her mom shed her winter clothing. "I kept thinking about Camila all day though, how is she doing? "

"She's asleep again... I found her by the door when I got home." Lauren put the cup she'd been holding on the coffee table.

"What do you mean, 'by the door'?" Clara asked, taking a seat on the couch and turning to face her.

"She was sitting by the door waiting for me. I..." Lauren paused, hugging a decorative pillow to her chest. "I don't know if I can do this." She wanted to say more, but she just didn't know where to start.

"What's wrong, honey?" Clara asked. She put a comforting hand on her shoulder and Lauren looked up to see her face. Clara was always so understanding , and Lauren couldn't help but love her for it.

"She just has all the wrong ideas and I'm not sure if I can help her." She started. "I want to, I want to help so badly, but all I do seems to be wrong and she's constantly on edge, like she's just waiting for me to beat the crap out of her and I don't know how to deal with it. I just..." a distressed noise escaped her throat "I just don't know what to do." She took a deep, shaky breath.

"Oh honey, you know you can always come to me and your dad for help right? I know  dad talked to you about leaving Camila in your care, but he didn't mean that you're on your own. We're always here to help, he just meant we didn't want to overload Camila with authority figures, you know?"

Clara pulled her closer and Lauren let herself settle against her, holding on to her waist.

Lauren took a few deep breaths, letting Clara's presence calm her. "I just don't want to scare her anymore."

"Well," Clara began softly, stroking her hair, "I can just give you educated guesses at the moment, but it seems like Camila is used to a lot of rules, right?"

Lauren nodded. "Yeah, definitely."

"Well then maybe, just for the time being, it might help put her at ease if she got new rules from you, since rules are familiar, right?"

She considered that for a moment. "It's worth a try, I guess, but what do I tell her?"

"Has your dad talked to you about the exam yet?" Clara asked.

"No, but I remember when Cooper had to take it."

"I'll go get some of the practice books from the garage tomorrow afternoon, so maybe you could give her a daily workload once she feels better, I'm sure that's a rule that could make her feel better, you know, things like that?"

"That sounds good." Lauren whipped her cheeks on the back of her palm, noticing her hands came back moist, she never realized she was crying. "I'll try that, and I'll call home at lunch, so she knows she can eat."

"That sounds wonderful. I'm so proud of you, honey." She felt her mom kiss the top of her head and it made her smile and hold onto her more tightly.

"Thank you." She sighed, burying her face in her shoulder again.

Lauren allowed herself to relax with her mother for a little while until her eyes caught the digital clock on the TV caught her eye. "We should make dinner." She sighed, extracting herself from the comforting embrace.