Saving Grace {Haylor}

Break-break-breaking Point

I can't differentiate morning from night.

I don't know if it's Monday or Friday.

I can't figure out if I've been here a week.

Two weeks.

A handful of days.

I don't know.

I'm pretty sure Britany thinks I'm crazy. How can I blame her, though? I never sleep. I'm constantly awake. Wasting away in a room drinking coffee and downing anti depressants.

There's no point anymore.

There's nothing to live for.

I can't be happy. Because, the one thing that made me happy, ripped me apart.

I'm so stupid.

I should've stayed with my parents.

Taking on a man with a child was so stupid. How was I to take on a family when I could hardly take on myself. It wasn't possible. This was a long time coming. I should've opened my eyes.

I rub my eyes, my legs falling off the edge of the edge of the bed.

"You fucking bitch."

Words cut like knives to my wrist and I can't figure out if it was in my head of where it was coming from.

"I know you can fucking hear me."

It's Harry. He stands outside, his voice going directly to my ear through the window a story up.

"Whatever, don't talk. Fine. But listen to what I have to say. Cause I know damn well you can hear me."

My body freezes. My spine tightens.

Chills.

"Let me down, fine. But don't let down my god damn daughter who looks up to you more than the stars at night. You're weak, Taylor. Weak. You leave the moment there's a bump in the road. I'm done with that shit. I've come here every god damn fucking day for the past ten days, trying to TALK to you. And you don't even have the decency to listen to what I have to say like a civilized human being. So here I am. Standing outside your window, telling you how it really is. Which, now that I think about it, I don't think anyone has before. I loved you Taylor. I really did. I thought you were my forever. My happy ending. But I guess it didn't end that way, did it? Look at us. You're not even able to look at me in the eyes because you god damn know you're in the wrong. You're an immature little teenage bitch who can't get her act together. Annie cries every night, wanting you. Praying for you to come home. What am I supposed to tell her? 'Mommy left?' You can't explain that to a six year old, Taylor. It's not that simple. You can't just not answer her calls at midnight because she can't sleep. Any person in their right mind with a heart wouldn't do that. Not only did you let me down, Taylor. No. You let Annie down. A little girl. With big dreams and a even bigger heart." He pauses. "When and if you decide to be a mature adult, lemme know so you can pick up your shit. I'll make sure to not be there."

I feel paralyzed. Broken.

I knew it was bad. But not this bad.

He hated me. He actually hated me.

Annie cried?

I feel a tear drip to the back of my hand.

"You're fucking crazy, Taylor!" He shouts even louder. "You're right. You were always right. Spending time on you... It's not spending. It's wasting. Go to hell."

His car revvs and he speeds down the street.

I jump and rush to the door, locking it and falling down the side.

Harry never said anything he didn't mean.

He was mad. Angry. He was furious.

My eyes fill with tears.

My head spins.

My stomach twists.

My vision blurs.

I settle my eyes on the one thing I know to be true. I crawl over to the dresser, tear stained clothes and all, and kneel with my head against the drawer. I'm loosing my mind.

My time was over.

My meter had expired.

I clench my stomach, holding back from screaming.

And it's not like screaming would do anything. Britany and Nate are at work... It's just me and a bottle of pills before my eyes.

I take a deep breathe and I feel nothing but dead weight on my shoulders. I pull the pills from the counter and pop off the top.

My chest rises and falls.

I pour a handful and stare down at the pink celexa pills. I pull down the water bottle and lift the lid with my teeth.

This was for the best.

If I leave, I can't hurt anyone anymore.

I take a sip and close my eyes tightly.

"See ya soon, Karlie." I whisper, filling my mouth with the pills and gulping down water until they're all past through my throat.

Every.

Last.

One.

A/N

Sorry this is so short, guys! Please don't hate me too much!!!