Please Find Me (Larry Stylinson Story AU)

Chapter 12

Harry's POV

I let out a groan when I started to wake up. I had finally gotten a good nights rest! I don't know how that happened but I was glad. Ever since my first day of school my dreams have been plagued with memories of Steve. It was impossible of getting the nightmares to go away, but I guess something finally made them stop. I would have to figure it out for sure. My eyes opened and I gasped. I guess I found out what made the nightmares stop. Lying next to me was a sleeping Louis. To make it even more weird, he was holding me close as if I was a giant teddy bear and he was a frightened child. Not that I minded of course but not that I liked it either. Nope. It had no effect on me at all. I did not like the fact that his strong arms were holding me protectively. I did not like that I felt so warm and loved in his embrace. And I most certainly did not like that my head was lying on his chest right above his heart so I could hear his calming heartbeat. Nope, not at all. Oh who was I kidding? I absolutely loved it. It was the best feeling in the world! I would lie next to Louis for the rest of my life if I could. I couldn't deny it anymore. It was too easy to see: I liked Louis Tomlinson. Plain and simple. There were no if, ands, or buts. I had a major crush on Louis. Which also meant I had a major problem.

I couldn't like Louis. It would cause too many issues in my already issue filled life. For one thing, I couldn't let anyone know I was gay. Last time someone found out about it Steve ended up....I shivered. Don't think about that Harry. As long as you don't think about it, it never happened. Secondly, I didn't want to pull Louis into my messed up life. If by some miracle Louis liked me; I wouldn't want him to have to deal with my past. I was already enough trouble as it is and my past would find some way to haunt him. Not to mention that there was no doubt my future would be just as messed up. No. I didn't want to pull him into a dead end relationship with me and life. Louis deserved so much more then that. He deserved so much for than me. Louis deserved a girl, or a guy who can make him laugh. He deserves someone who can help him when he has a problem. He deserves someone he can be romantic and have fun with. He deserves someone who isn't as fucked up as me. But that stuff didn't even matter because of one important thing. Also known as reason three, the biggest and most important reason of all. Louis can't like me. Louis isn't gay. Even if he were gay there was no way in hell he would find me even the slightest bit appealing. I was a loser, a waste of space. Better off dead. No one could ever like someone like meI was just so, so worthless. Hell, I barely even like me. If it weren't for that fact that I thought life was so precious, I would be dead. I would have killed myself long ago. But I'd didnt. And sometimes I even regret that, just like i'm sure everyone else did.

"what are you thinking about?" A deep, husky voice asked snapping me out of my thoughts. I stared down at Louis in shock for two reasons. For one, I didn't realize he woke up! And secondly, his morning voice was fucking sexy. I blushed a little when that thought sprung up in my mind. I shook my head trying to get rid of it and looked away from Louis

"N-nothing." I murmured and started chewing on the inside of my cheek. I was nervous. I didn't want Louis to know that I liked him. If he did, he would leave sooner then he would have before. Not to mention I didn't think I would be able to take his bullying.

"Don't do that." Louis said suddenly. I looked backup at him confused.

"D-don't do what?" I questioned him with a small smile. I couldn't help but be happy. Even though Louis woke up, his arms were still around me. I would have thought he would have moved then away right away. Maybe even jump up in disgust that he had spelt with me. Even if it was his fault.

"Chew the inside of your cheek. You do it when your nervous and then you start to think about something that makes you get this sad look on your face. I don't like it when you get sad." Louis' voice strung a sad note to it when he mentioned me being sad. I couldn't believe that he payed close enough attention to me to figure that out! Hell, I couldn't believe that he cared enough that he didn't want me to be sad. No one has ever payed close enough attention to me before to ever notice something so personal about me before. To be honest, I rather liked it. It made me feel special and that was something I've never felt before either.

"I-I'm sorry." I said softly when my voice finally came back. "I didn't m-mean to make you s-sad." Louis just smiled at me and pulled me closer. He kissed the top of my head which only succeeded in making blush and want him even more.

"Don't be sorry, you only make me sad when you're sad. Someone as wonderful as you should never have to be sad." he said look deep into my eyes. Louis said it so sincerely that I couldn't help but believe him. There was no one I could lie to myself and say that it was all a trick. "Most of the time you make me so incredibly happy....Harry can I ask you a question?" Louis stared down at me. The intensity in his eyes made me know that this was a very important question and that, whatever it was, was serious. I nodded slowly.

"Y-yeah I'd c-course," I said curiosity burning through my body. What would he possible want to ask that would so important? I saw(and felt since I was still in his arms) Louis take a deep breath to calm himself. He seemed really nervous. Finally he spoke.

"Harry; will you g-"

"HARRY!" an Irish voice yelled and was quickly followed by the bang of my door being slammed open.

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Haha, what do you guys think? I hope you're not angry with me for two reasons! One. The story ^^^^^ and two. Because I didn't post yesterday. I was busy sooo yeah..... Anywho, this chapter is dedicated to youraveragefangirl for being the first to get the question right and because she was one of the two to even guess! Now, I'm gonna ask a question for this chapter but if only two people guess then I'm not doing them anymore. There isn't a point of doing it when only two people say anything about it! Now I have two questions because I don't know if anyone will get the first question right. However, the rules are gonna change because of there being two questions instead of one. If no one can answer the first question right, then whoever answered the second question right first gets the dedication. However, if someone does answer the first question right then they get it, even if twenty people answered the second question right before them. Got it? If not ask! Here it is: Why did Harry start to get nightmares right after the first day of school? Now don't just say like because Liam or something. I want more then one word answers for this one! Tell me why, then explain it. There are some hints throughout the story so hopefully they are good ones and you can maybe figure it out! Heres the second question: what was Louis gonna ask Harry before Niall came in? That's all! I hope you guys liked this chapter and please tell me wht you think! I love you all and I hope you have a beautiful day!

~Abby