Please Find Me (Larry Stylinson Story AU)

Chapter 20

Harry's POV

"Harry, I think it's time we had a talk," Liam said very seriously. I gulped. Uh oh.

"A-about what?" I asked as I nervously played with the hem of my shirt. What could he possibly want to talk about? Everything was perfect; everything was fine. There is nothing to talk about! Nothing at all... Oh stop being so stupid. You know perfectly well what he wants to talk about! How could I even begin to pretend that everything was ok? It was a little known fact that nothing in my life had ever been ok. No, I didn't deserve such relief. Everything always, always, had to be worse than just a simple OK. 

"Will you please look at us, Harry?" Niall said quietly from besides me. I looked up at him with wide eyes. He was in this too? Damn it! Now I was outnumbered! Not that I ever had a chance anyways. Niall's own blue eyes widened when he took in my already defeated expression, "Don't be so defeated! Liam and I only want to help you! We just want you to be happy! You make it seem like we kidnapped your Mum and holding her against her will until you give us like a million pounds or something!" 

"Niall!" Liam hissed while glaring at him. I was frozen in terror of the mere thought of my Mum being kidnapped and forced to endure what I had to. My poor mother... Being beaten and raped until she was numb physically and emotionally. Tears started to collect in my eyes as images started popping up in my brain. 

"Oh my god! Harry, I'm so sorry!" Niall exclaimed sounding like he was about to cry himself, "I didn't mean that! Don't cry! Please don't cry!" I looked over at Niall, the tears blurring him slightly as he continued to ramble on about how sorry he was and how he didn't want me to cry. Liam, deciding to put Niall out of his misery, started to speak.

"He didn't mean it like that, Harry." Liam started to explain with his concerned eyes fixed on me. "It's just that you looked so defeated and he was trying to say that there are worse things that could happen instead of us just talking with you." Liam scooted his chair over towards me and slung his arm around my shoulders. "Just remember that your mum isn't kidnapped, and that she never had to go through what you went through. She's fine, and always will be." I nodded slowly as I leaned my weight against the slightly taller boy. Liam was right. My mum was perfectly fine, and safe at work. The chances of that ever happening to her were slim to none, but it was that 'slim' part that scared the crap out of me. 

"I'm really sorry, Harry. I didn't mean it like that." Niall mumbled ashamed of himself. "I should've been more careful of what I was saying." Looking at Niall, I couldn't help but forgive him. It would be quite difficult not considering the fact he looked like he was a little boy getting yelled out. He just looked so scare, and regretful.

"I-it's ok, N-nialler." I said and pulled away from Liam in order to give him a hug. Niall gladly took the hug and when I pulled back I couldn't help but notice the new found smile on his face so I couldn't help but smile back. Liam cleared his throat and started to speak when he got our attention.

"We still need to talk, and I think it would be best if some of us didn't say anything," Liam said firmly while shooting a look at Niall. All Niall did was smile sheepishly and nod indiciting that Liam should conutine. "We understand that what Steve did to you was horrible, but you can't blame Lou for it."

"B-but I'm n-not!" I exclaimed, but even I knew that was a lie. I was totally, and unfairly, blaming Louis for what his father did to me. I didn't know why, because he had nothing to do with it. Maybe I was just scared. Scared that Louis was going to hurt me like his father. Or worse. Which I had no doubt that Louis would be able to tear apart my heart a lot more then Steve was ever able to do.

"That's a lie, mate and you know it." Liam said with his eyebrows raised. I chewed the inside of my cheek and hung my head in shame. Yeah, I knew it. "You can't keep on blaming Louis. It's not his fault. He didn't hurt you or do anything to hurt you! Infact, he even made sure no one did hurt you! If you would stop and look for just one second you would see that Louis cares so much about you! You just can't blame him. It's not fair to him or yourself."

My eyebrows furrowed when he said the last sentence. 'It's not fair to him or yourself' What did that mean? I knew it wasn't fair to Louis, but how come it wasn't fair to me? Unable to hold in my curiosity I spoke up. "What d-do you mean it's not f-fair to myself? I know it's n-not fair for L-Louis, but....m-me?" Liam gave me a small smile before he started to explain.

"Harry, you may think you don't but it's really easy to see that you like Louis. It's impossible to miss how much happier you seem around him. You're so much more relaxed, and it's like you've finally found someone you can trust." Liam looked down at the ground with a smile then looked back up at me, "Please Harry. Just give Louis another chance." 

I bit down harder on the tissue of my cheek. Should I give Louis another chance? He didn't really do anything the first time. I mean, he didn't do anything at all the first time. I was, I am just scared that Louis is going to hurt me. Louis will be able to hurt me the way no one ever has. He will be able to do much worse then tear me limb from limb. He'll be able to do more damage then beating me until I couldn't breath. It'd be able to tear down my walls, and break my heart. He'd be able to break my heart in two, and just walk away while all my defenses where destroyed on the floor. He'd be able to laugh while all I'd be able to do was cry, and wished that Steve had finished the job. But that was what I deserved, wasn't it? So wasn't it my job to do just that? To let this amazing boy do such things to me? Or was he what I wanted so much, that I was willing to risk such pain? I opened my mouth to reply but it wasn't my voice that came out.

"Harry?" A soothing voice said from behind me. I slowly looked around to Louis. Well, speak of the devil, and he shall appear. I was so focused on Louis that I didn't notice the person standing next to him until he said Louis' name. I gasped when my eyes settled on the too familiar man. Blue eyes, blond hair, tall. It was the man of my nightmares. It was the man who scarred me for life. It was Steve. And that's when I broke.

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Oh my poptarts I love you all so much! You are all so sweet and you guys just made my days so much better whenever I got a comment telling me that they hoped that I got better! It just made me so happy! I was so surprised to see that so many people cared! I thought I'd get like one comment saying to get better, and that would be all but no! They were tons! Gosh.... OK so, yes, I don't feel any pain anymore! And yes it should be gone (I've been taking sooooo many pills it's rediculous!) However, I found out that there is a large chance that I could get something like this again because of my um condition that we recently JUST found out again. I don't know if I wanna say because it's so awkward... Haha, if enough people ask I'll just say it. The only important thing to know is that I need to go into see a doctor who knows about that say and then he will say whether it needs to be fixed or not, and fixing means surgery. At least if I have to do that I'll be knocked out! Unlike when they cut me open XD. But don't worry guys, the doctor said if the other doctor says I need one, I'd be able to wait until like summer! Unless I get a cyst again then they might make it sooner! Hopefully I'll be fine! On the bright side, my pills are almost gone! Tomorrow is the last day! Yes, I counted them to know.... Anywho, I hope you guys liked this chapter! And Please tell me what you guys think! um, here's the question:Whos' going to the gathering in Canada on the 23? If you are who do you wanna meet? If not, then did you want to go? So yeah, that's that. Oh and two things guys: School started last week so I'll be busier then usual, and I am such an idiot! After a couple days of feeling no pain from my cyst I like punch my tummy a couple times (I didn't mean to) so now it hurts so much! I'm such a fail XD. Haha, I love you all, and have a great day!

~Abby <3