Pairs - A Dolan Twin Fanfiction

Chapter Twenty-Five - Finals

Julia's POV

May 17, 2017 & May 23, 2017

I run up the stairs without much thought, and I hear sniffles through the door. "Kat?" I open her door, which creaks as I see her looking out the window of her room as she fiddles with some kind of necklace in her hand. She doesn't turn around, just stays planted on the ground.

"Just leave me the hell alone," she sniffles, bringing a hand to her eyes.

I sigh, and say to her, "I know about Jaqueline. And that is not your fault. None of this is your fault," she turns around and I see her red, puffy eyes and pink cheeks, "You should not feel horrible, especially on your birthday."

"Sam told you, didn't he?" God, I can't trust anyone here!" She tries to move things around her room to keep from looking me in the eye, but I grab her arm.

"Kat, you better tell me right now what happened or you will regret it." I hated being menacing and I hated blackmailing her but I didn't see any other solution and I just didn't want her to hurt.

She laughs, but it doesn't sound joyous and does not meet her eyes at all, "That's what you want, isn't it? For me to leave, for you to be an only child, the perfect star child, huh? Well, you've already done that without me leaving, haven't you? Ever since Dan left you want to be the perfect one! As long as you keep taking your meds, you'll be fine, right? Nothing to worry about!"

I couldn't find my voice to speak. This is what it was about? Me? That can't be all, right? And I've never thought that I wanted to ever be better than her. I push my croaking voice out of my lips, "I can't believe you'd think that, Kat! I've never tried to one-up you, and you know I need it! You know what happened last time!"

"What happened last time?" Ethan walks in from behind me, followed by Grayson. No. I never wanted to pull either of them into this. Not now, not ever.

"Oh, you mean last time Julia had a panic attack about a failing grade? And how she was so worried she had to get a prescription for anxiety from a doctor?"

Ethan's face was going white, while I could feel my anger surging through me at a million miles an hour. Grayson looked like he was going to faint. "I can't believe you!" I screamed at her, "God, I am so sick of you pushing me away when you need to face your problems!" I gasp for another breath. "I am done helping you! You can do this on your own!" I push through the two of them behind me and run into my room, locking my door shut.

I never came out of my room that night.

- - -

Finals week came out of nowhere, and I had been avoiding Ethan for so long. I thought I could keep my secret. Keep it from my mind, keep it from me. And so I busied myself like I do every time I'm stressed, and I didn't speak to Kat once for the next week. Every time I walked out of my room, I made sure she wasn't in the room I was walking into or any area where she could see me. Our parents never noticed. They never notice, being so caught up in their jobs. The two of us had distanced ourselves from the Dolans, even though it was hard to, considering we had alot of classes with them.

As I bubbled in my last answer to my Chemistry Final, I took my seat back next to Ethan, unfortunately. I was thankful we weren't allowed to talk, since I had been avoiding him since Kat's party. I can see him staring at me at the edges of my vision, so I pull my book closer to me so I don't see his figure. I hear scrawling from a pencil next to me, and a piece of paper is pushed towards me. Ethan looks at me pleadingly, and I roll my eyes, reading the ripped piece of paper.

We need to talk. Come to my house after school, please?

I knew I couldn't avoid him forever, so I grudgingly scribbled back an answer.

Fine. You know I'm sorry for not telling you, I just haven't let myself think about it for a long time.

He takes it back, and I read it again.

Just tell me everything when we get there.

- -

Hi! So first off, I just want to say that I never meant to insult mental issues in this chapter. I used it to bring more awareness to my readers and also to make the story more realistic, and I don't ever mean for anyone to get offended by this, because this is a real problem that many people (including me) struggle with. In the story, Julia needs her prescription to keep from getting overly stressed out/having panic attacks, and that's why I put it in! So yeah, please don't take it in a way that says I'm insulting people who have anxiety and struggle with it. And always know that if you need to talk to someone, please don't be afraid to do it! There is always someone that will listen to you. Anyway, here's the QOTD!

Question #25 is.... what is your favorite song currently? Mine is Postcard, by Troye Sivan!

I'm gonna go now, sorry for the long AN! Bye!

-Tashi :)