Chapter Twenty-One

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Weeks past and Lucian was getting along well. He received tutoring six hours every day, not including the weekends. Lucian spent the weekends in a trans and non binary support group, led by Dr. Robins themself. Connor also ensured private sessions with Dr. Robins, and it had shown great changes in the young man.

However, nothing seemed to stop the nightmares. Lucian would walk into his newly decorated room at night after a good shower and feel eternally grateful for everything Lieutenant Hank and Detective Connor had done for him. When he shut his eyes, though, he'd be back with Jack.

Things would start off great, of course. Jack would be there, holding Lucian close and telling him how perfect he could be. But as their day progressed Jack would become more and more agitated until finally the hitting started. That was how it was for him every night, and he'd always wake up drenched in sweat, frightened until he realized where he actually was.

He kept telling himself he could handle it. He didn't want to worry his two guardians. That was what he kept telling himself until a Friday night came around and his dream was nothing like the others.

Lucian was there, back at that house, surrounded by those children. This time though he wasn't hiding.. he was watching. Helpless and in the corner, he couldn't do anything but watch as those defenseless kids were screaming-god those screams-Lucian remembered the sound from when he was hiding in that room. But seeing as he was this close up and watching, they were louder, piercing at his ears and making them bleed.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry," Lucian sobbed out as red splattered against those dirty walls. Soon enough the only sound that remained was his ragged breathing, and then footsteps as someone neared him. Slowly and cautiously, Lucian looked up to see a bloodied Jack looking down at him.

"Luci.. look what you did, baby." His deep voice brought an unnerving chill down the poor boy's spine. He used his gun to motion over the room, all of the blood and all of the bodies..

"If you had just been a good boy.. this wouldn't have happened." His voice got dark and another loud sob came from Lucian. He tried to hold it all back but he could not, so he was just left to cry in front of the man that haunted his dreams.

"Shh, shh, don't cry." Jack whispered as he kneeled down and caressed his cheek. It was deceivingly comforting, and the small part of Lucian that still loved Jack gave in, and leaned into his touch.

Jack's smile was simply evil as he pressed his lips against Lucian's forehead. A shudder of a breath came from the young man as the contact brought him back to the moments when Jack was nice..

When Jack loved him.

Jack kissed down Lucian's tear stained cheeks until they reached his mouth. Lucian was shaking at that point, waiting for the familiar touch of Jack's lips against his, that sick feeling he thought he was finally over.

But Jack did not kiss those tear stained lips. He just chuckled, a dark sound that made Lucian eyes open wide. And as soon as they opened he was greeted with Jack's deranged smiling face as he pulled the trigger and shot through his own temple-

Screams from Lucian's bedroom woke Hank up instantly. He jumped from the bed and ran into his room without a second thought. When he turned the lights on he could see Lucian writhing and screaming, the sheets kicked off and on the floor, his dark brown eyes wide open.

Hank brought the shaking boy in his arms and talked to him, telling him it was just a dream, that he was safe, until finally it worked. Connor had woken up and walked in just as the screaming died down. Lucian was doing breathing exercises against Hank's chest. Holding Lucian like that reminded Hank of a time so long ago. He brushed his fingers through black hair and hoped it helped the young man calm down.

Connor neared them both and kneeled down as he took Lucian's hand. The android hummed a lullaby and it filled the finally silent room. They stayed like that for what felt like hours until Lucian fell asleep in Hank's arms.

Hank gently laid Lucian down and then Connor tucked him in. He felt his husband's hand on his shoulder as he brushed the black strands of hair from Lucian's forehead. No more tears, Connor noted. Just a peaceful face with hopefully peaceful dreams.

The couple lingered for just moment longer. Connor leaned against Hank's chest and the older man wrapped his arms around him as they watched Lucian sleep. After awhile they left him be, cutting the light off and gently shutting the door behind them as they did.

Hank was so tired but that didn't stop him from kissing Connor lovingly when they made it back to their bedroom. Though what was going on with Lucian was very serious and would need to be discussed with Dr. Robins, they still felt happy with what just happened. Holding Lucian like that and getting him to sleep had been so fulfilling to them.

Lucian couldn't really remember what he was dreaming about. All he knew then was that he was feeling something completely different from what he was feeling before. The word was foreign to him in this context but it was true all the same.

Love.

He had never known the love of a parent before. He had his Nani, his grandmother, but her love faded over time with the dementia. She supported Lucian's transition when it started at twelve, but as her mind faded she kept forgetting who he was. She was the only one to take care of Lucian, but after a time it was Lucian who was taking care of her.

It was a hard decision to send his Nani away, but he knew there were people who could take better care of her. He missed her but this new feeling was different from the love of a grandparent.

It was the love of a father-two fathers. He had never experienced the love of one so two was overwhelming to say the least. But he was happy. Not the fake happiness that Jack gave him, however. Real, true, happiness that left his dreams bright and filled with wonder. And gave him hope for the future.

~*~

Author's Note: I apologize for the lack of Hannor in this chapter. This was a way to get to know Lucian more and I am happy with the way it turned out. It won't always be like this though so don't worry. There will be more Hannor and Lucian may find a love of his own soon.

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