Not Another High School Love Story

20. Today

Today's already shaping up to be pretty great, especially when we finally make it down to the boardwalk. There are people everywhere, it's more packed than I would've thought, which is good because it means Brent and I are less likely to be spotted by anyone we know. The band that's playing isn't the best, I figure it's probably just some locals who were cheap and available, but it only adds to the charm. The air smells sweet, no doubt a mingling of the food stands that litter the walkways, and every one of the neighboring buildings is covered in strings of lights. It's beautiful.

We jump right in to start enjoying ourselves, and we wait in line to get some cotton candy to share—my treat. Then we somehow manage to find a spot for ourselves on the grass as close to the band as we can get before sitting down to listen for a while. It's not enough for us to have come here like this though, Brent wants to push it even farther so he reaches over and grabs my hand. Immediately I'm panicked, and I glance at him before I glance around, desperately scanning to make sure nobody's paying attention. I'm probably just being silly, but I haven't made it this far in life by being brave. I've made it by being safe.

Brent grins wildly at how nervous I am, and as if to make a point he scoots over so that he's even closer to me. Doesn't he have more to lose than I do? Maybe he's just gotten used to the world opening right up to give him whatever he wants, because he doesn't even seem to think about it at all. This is what my life's going to be like for as long as I'm with him though, I'm always going to be two steps behind, trying to keep up. Obviously I'm not about to pull away from him, so I guess that means I have to be brave today too.

Despite how quaint it is there's only so much banality we can take, so after we've listened to a few songs we wander further down the boardwalk to check out whatever else is going on. There are a ton of stands set up, churches, businesses, that sort of thing, but there's also a photo booth just waiting for us. It's not even a question, and Brent and I flash each other knowing grins before hurrying over. I stick my tongue out for the first picture, but then we switch to being serious when the camera clicks again. After that I flex my arms as if I have any muscle whatsoever to show off, and then Brent surprises me on the last one.

He throws his arm around my neck and puts his lips on my cheek, leaving me stunned as the final picture flashes. When we climb out and take a look he treats me to a bout of laughter when he sees my shocked expression in the photo. We each get a copy and I put mine in my pocket after punching him on the arm, but I'm pretty sure it's worth it to him. By the time we've seen everything there is to see we end up just strolling slowly along the boardwalk, trying to find any way to stretch out the time so we don't have to go home just yet. I think he likes the risk we're taking a little too much, but I let him have his fun as he suddenly goes quiet.

"So what are we supposed to call this?" Brent finally asks. It catches me off guard because I thought we were having a casual conversation about the festival and video games, but he clearly has other things on his mind. They're not things I even thought he wondered about.

"What do you want to call it?" I'm not going to be the one who decides, even if I've given it a lot of thought myself. I know what I want, but at the same time I understand how it's got to be, it doesn't leave us with a lot of options. Surprisingly, I find that it's easier being brave in front of these strangers than it is to be brave with him. At least about this. I can talk about a lot of things with him, but I think it'd kill me if I told him what I wanted and he rejected me. No, I'll keep letting him be the brave one, I'll do what I've always done to get by—I'll just go along with whatever he wants, and I'll play it safe.

"I don't fucking know." He mumbles. He stops to lean against the railing and look out over the river, and I join him as I study his face carefully. I'm shocked to see he's actually blushing, which makes it really hard not to tease him, but I bite my tongue while he struggles to meet my gaze. This was a bridge he must've known we'd have to cross eventually, and I guess today's the day for that too, but neither of us wants to be the one to test it. I've given enough though, the only thing he gets now is my patience, and eventually he realizes that as he licks his lips. "Come on, don't make me feel stupid for even asking. Are we dating or what?"