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astroash: I'm scared

essydeaton: why
essydeaton: what's up

astroash: luke called me

essydeaton: and?

astroash: ithinkistillhavefeelingsforhimanditsnotlikeiwanttoijustnevergotoverhimproperly

essydeaton: ash :/

astroash: it's not like I want it to happen
astroash: it just is

essydeaton: it can't

astroash: I know

essydeaton: have you told him?
essydeaton: and have you told calum?

astroash: no and no
astroash: that's why I'm scared
astroash: because calum's going to be here tomorrow
astroash: and now this is happening

essydeaton: did luke do something?
essydeaton: or what
essydeaton: please help me understand why you're even thinking about HIM like that
essydeaton: of all people

astroash: he called me
astroash: he needed to talk about something and only I knew about it so
astroash: and it was like nothing ever happened
astroash: we were laughing and joking and he made me smile
astroash: and I hung up and I kind of had an epiphany and I was like oh fuck lmao that's not good

essydeaton: oh
essydeaton: you need to talk to him

astroash: no

essydeaton: yes
essydeaton: you can't bottle this up like you always do

astroash: wow
astroash: attack me then

essydeaton: I'm serious, ashton
essydeaton: you shove this stuff down and act like you're fine but I know you
essydeaton: and I was there to pick up the pieces of you he left everywhere
essydeaton: i was the one who saw all the emotional breakdowns you had over him. I know how much he meant to you, and I know that this is a bigger deal than you're making it.
essydeaton: you need to tell him.

astroash:


essydeaton: do you want this to fuck up your relationship with calum when he- and luke- inevitably find out about it?

astroash: no

essydeaton: then tell them.
essydeaton: I literally know you better than you know yourself so if I were you I'd take my advice
essydeaton: I'm older and wiser

astroash: :(

essydeaton: :(

astroash: I don't want him to hate me

essydeaton: calum is incapable of hating you

astroash: not calum

essydeaton: oh

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