Okay, Do you guys remeber when I said a random chapter was the saddest chapter ever? Well this chapter way sadder. Like, I was so depressed when i was writting it. But its nessasry. So enjoy
*Jessie's POV As Usual*
I stared at the sun rise, my legs dangling over the railing of Misses. Lucille's porch. Nothing here can I really associate with Tristan. I know he spent the better part of his life here, in this house, yet I find it hard to picture him sitting on this very porch, watching the sun rise.
Watching the sun rise with some girl...
I have a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach. Today.. I had to tell him. Tell him that this is our last week together. If he hates me.. I guess he hate's me. No. I'm full of shit. If he hate's me I'mma cry like a baby. I'm so not looking forward to telling him.
The door opens and closes. I'm half expecting half dreading Tristan's appearance. But no, it's only Vanessa. She take's a seat next to me. Rests her head on my shoulder. We gaze at the horizon in silence for a while.
"I guess you won't be visiting often" she says so softly I almost don't hear her.
"I guess not." I seem to choke on my words. My cheeks are wet. I'm not sure when I started crying.
I look down at Nessa. She's crying to. I take her hand. There's nothing intimate about the action, just comforting.
"Nessa" I say, a little numbly.
"Mhm?" she sniffles.
"I need to tell him"
She nods wearily. Telling Tristan seems to make it more real for both of us. I already predicted Vanessa's reaction-sadness. Feeling like she's lost something. That's how I feel when I think about losing her. I'm dreading the end of this week.
But Tristan. How will he react? A painful indifference? That'd hurt me a lot, not that I particularly want this to be emotionally scarring. But the more selfish part of me wants the reassurance of a strong reaction from him. Will he be upset? Angry?
"What's wrong?!" a startled voice interrupts me and Vanessa from our separate thoughts.
Vanessa opens her mouth-some coy excuse almost visible on the tip of her tongue, but I hold my hand up, the gesture clearly meaning 'Let me speak'. I eye Evan resignedly. Finally, my minds made up.
"I'm moving" I admit unenthusiastically.
Evan looks confused, then sorry on my behalf.
"How far?" he venture's.
"New York" he gaps at me.
"That's far" he says, trying to look sheepish so I don't feel so bad.
"Yeah. It is" I agree softly.
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*Tristan's POV*
"Lets go for a walk" Jessie urges. Me and Vanessa are sitting on the couch, Evan's in the recliner and Jessie's standing in front of me trying to yank me off the couch. The effort he's putting up is adorable considering I haven't budged.
"Why do you want to go for a walk so bad?" I ask. I don't want to go for a walk. For some strange reason I feel like something's different about today. Every time I look at one of my friends they quickly look away, a guilty flare in there eye's.
Jess won't even look at me.
My apprehension is only growing with Jessie's sudden demands for a walk. His tone is serious, eye's focused, though not on me of course. He's looking out the window, avoiding my gaze like his life depends on it.
"I just do" he snaps.
My heart starts pounding and I feel like my stomach is in my throat. My head feels to light and my hands feel to heavy. "Okay. Fine "I say, getting up abruptly and towering over him, making him meet my eye's. His are sparkling with sadness.
In silence we take the back door out of the house and I hurry along the beach, making Jessie almost have to jog to keep up. I can feel him looking at me now, but its my turn to pretend I don't notice, so I ignore his looks and keep my face turned straight ahead.
"Are you okay?" he asks gently.
I frown and look down at him. He looks cute as he did the first day I meet him, his hair tousled and in his eye's, his cheek bones prompt and eye's so innocent that they almost demand your attention. But something wrong. He looks.. Off.
"I don't know" I clench and unclench my jaw. "I wish someone would tell me what the fuck is going on" I fume, wanting to hit something. It's frustrating being kept out of the big secret.
"That's why I took you out here" he murmurs, looking guilty.
"Well, what is it?" I soften my tone a little, feeling like a jerk.
He looks away, out towards the ocean.
"Jessie?" I probe.
"I...." he frowns, pushes the hair from his eye's.
"You want to break up, don't you?!" the panicked words jump from my mouth, exposing my fear of being left. He looks up at me, startled and perplexed. I'm relived to see that he's dismissing my idea as wrong, no his face is telling me he clearly does not want to break up.
Then what's wrong?
"I'm moving. To New York" he blurts
My face is blank with confusion for a moment. When his words finally dawn on me, I don't understand what he's saying. Moving? To New York? That's completely ridiculous. Why would he move there? No. we just started dating, it's impossible for him to randomly pack up and move away.
It hit me like a blow, all air rushing from my lungs. My vision spins for a moment. I choke, grasping for air. This is no joke. He's moving. My Jessie. My sweet little boyfriend. Moving. Nothing I can do about it. I'm only seventeen. Nothing. I. can. Do.
"Why. Why the fuck didn't you tell me?!" I manage to shout. I feel my face turning red with rage. I'm not really angry with him, not really. I'm frustrated with my own helplessness to prevent this. I need something to vent my anger on. Jessie seems like a pretty good target at the moment.
"I.. I didn't want you to break up with me" he sniffs, trying to keep his head high. Tears are brimming his eye's, trying to flood over his tear line's and stain his face with his own depression. I hate every single ounce of liquid that's finally spilling down his cheeks, leaving pathetic trails in there wake.
"Evan knew. Vanessa knew. Did it even occur to you that I might like to know?!" I'm towering over him threateningly now. I know it's not his fault. Know I'm being a total dick. But I can't seem to stop. Destruction feels good. Knowing someone else is hurting feels good.
"I thought you should be focusing on your relationship with your mother!" he finally shouts back in his own defence. This make's me angrier. My mother. I don't give half a damn about my mother. She's just some heartless bitch that gave birth to me.
I bunch the front of his shirt in my fist. I won't actually lay a hand on him, but I want him to realise just how menacing I am. "Jessie your pathetic. I can't believe I ever went out with you" I hiss, and when I let go of the hem of his shirt he crumple's to the sand, hiccupping on his own sobs.
I storm off, no destination in mind.
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Omg!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! waht do you think!?!?!
Do you hate Tristan now? Does Jessie deserve it!?!?!
Just whsoe side are you on1?!?!??!!?
let me know ;) comment comment comment. this chapter really needs comments. Why? oh becuase. I have 87 fans. 87.
I hate limits and stuff, but this chapter is of epic importance. So I need thirty comments before I upload again. All from difffrent people. Have fun with that fanns
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Your My Dream (BoyxBoy)
RomanceFollows main charecter Jessie Star through life.Jessie's known he was gay for awhile now, but thought it was best to stay in the closet until highschool was over.When Tristan move's to his town and starts attending his highschool and starts appearin...
