FIFTH HALF ― luke hemmings ✓

#14

I stared at my phone for so long I almost forgot I was driving. I hurried and drove once again, the ringing of my phone blaring on the car and Luke's question still looming in the air. I have no idea how and why would Luke's mom call me in the middle of the day without any other messages from before, nor reason that I could think of that would suggest the call was necessary.

The call stopped at once and I almost breathe out in relief when it rang once again, and before I could even reach it, Luke did the honor of answering it and putting it on loudspeaker. [Oh, hi, Lacey!] I opened my mouth to speak but no words came out of my mouth just then. I admit I was quite close with Luke's mother but after the whole thing about her son and I, I may have gone off the radar and it has been a year since I've heard of her voice again.

I scanned Luke briefly, his droopy eyes curious but insinuated that I should answer. "Hey, Liz. I-It's so good to hear from you again." I steered towards the curve and on to the exclusive village where Luke's house is. "What's going on?"

[It's so good to hear from you as well! It's been so long, Lace. I missed you! The family misses you.] My heart ached a bit from the thought of me, being close to his family so much that the mere memory of being with them makes me miss everything all at once even if I didn't want to. [I just called to let you know that you're invited, of course together with my Lukey, to Jack's birthday. A little family gathering.] My foot stepped on the brakes so hard the phone almost skidded away from the holder and Luke almost slipping on the seat. I sent him an apologetic look, while having a nervous breakdown at the same time.

"I'll have to check—"

[Family misses you. And I'm sure Luke does, too.] I gulped, she didn't know Luke's just right beside me, with an unknown expression painted on his weary face. [He called the other day, said he misses you when I ask about you.] My teeth gritted, too scared to look at Luke's face—from what? Maybe embarrassment. [Whatever happened to you two, I'm sure you'll find each other around it. You could start on Jack's birthday next week. We'll be expecting you!]

"Liz—"

[Alright, I gotta go! Take care, Lace!]

The call dropped just then and the silence enveloped us once again. But this time? Much weirder and awkward than the previous one. Not one of us spoke on the ride home, and until we reached his garage with two more of his car. Not one word when I went out and towards the driveway to try booking myself a ride. "Do you wanna stay over?" Luke spoke behind me and I turned, ready to take down his offer when the sight of him all sick and pale made me think twice if I should really leave him at this state...

I blame my undying loyalty for a friendship I promised years ago for doing this...

I didn't warrant him an answer as I made my way inside his huge house. The one he bought together with Liz and me using them money they made from the second album. The two story-house that I sure was envious from, with it being so sleek and almost unreal. It's as if even if I wrote a hundred songs for any band, I wouldn't get to afford a house like this.

I sat down at the smaller couch and took out my phone, knowing my way inside the house for being here quite a handful of times, and Luke lying down at the other side of the sofa. It took me a couple of bored scrolling on my social media before I finally look at the vocalist who hadn't moved an inch on the sofa, with only another pair of sweater covering him.

I sighed and stood up, still no movement from him as I made my way upstairs towards the loft where his bed is at, almost taking the time to be amused on seeing the penguin blanket I bought as a house warming gift, sprawled on his king size bed. I grabbed it, and a few pillows as I wondered he'll be too lazy and too sick to move from the sofa, going back down with everything at hand and going over his side where I had to lay everything down before trying to wake him up.

It took me a long while before I had the courage to nudge his hand, causing him to wake up a little bit. "Bundle up, Lucas." I dragged the sweater away as he grunted like a kid, replacing it with the warm blanket and leveling his head to the pillow.

"Thank you, Lace." He hummed as I turned, and it almost sent my heart into a fit of endless beating. I shut my eyes completely, having the utmost urge to run and go home, but remembering that this man is probably too sick to treat himself on his own—I began to think twice...

I still blame myself for all this. If I took even one hobby at this break? I wouldn't be here. I wouldn't be in the same place with the person I least expect to be with on my last few months with the band. Calum had so many plans, Ashton is probably at the gym getting all buff and taut, and I didn't want to bother Mikey's catching up with his girlfriend for all this.

That leaves me stuck with him. Like always.

There are only limited things I could do at Luke's house to prevent my mind from going haywire. One is, to watch a movie. It took me a while to choose one and as soon as I did, I used the extra sweater to bundle up at the small couch, tugging my knee closer to my chest while I take my time to calm myself and to also—wait for him to wake up. I already made soup beforehand—which I didn't expect I'll ever do again, and placed a small towel right by his forehead while he's asleep.

Times like this, I wished things had never changed between us. Times like this made me want to feel it again... The butterflies, the beaming smiles we give each other, and the electricity tingling under my skin, bothering me in my sleep as I continued to dream and think about him. I was a lovesick kid, a lovesick teenager, and still one as an adult. All because of one boy.

I did try dating. A bunch of college boys that I thought I was interested in. But an hour ride home changes all that as soon as I saw one of his charming smiles, followed by a warm bear hug, and a kiss right by the forehead.

He always, always does something to make me change my mind. Even unknowingly. But he never, oh how oblivious was he, he never knew just how much I love him. His idiotic jokes, his unending love for penguins even secretly now, and how he's always embarrassed about everything.

I hate him, I do. But the more I tried to hate him, the more I tend to think about him. About how now, I hate his smile, how I hate memories of him, and how I hate smelling his cologne everywhere. I wanted to hate his hair for not being a quiff anymore, I wanted to hate his laugh, nor his bright blue eyes. But no, I can't... I can't hate him completely.

"Lacey?" He called out and it brought me out of the trance. "Lacey?" I frowned, slowly making my way towards him as he continued to call out my name. It took me a while to realize that he's not fully awake--at least not yet. "Lace?"

"I-I'm here." I stuttered, not knowing what to do in this specific situation.

He opened his eyes, and if it was shining brightly like the skies before? His blue eyes are weary and dull. It's as if it hadn't seen another bright thing for so long. "You're still here." He mumbled but I looked away, picking up the damp towel at this forehead and turning to head to the kitchen when his warm hands caught mine. Sending the electricity I long to forget.

"Luke, I—" He squeezed his eyes shut for a while before hoisting himself up, completely facing me as he found the balance to stand upright. "I think you should lie down." He never did—hence, he rounded his arms around my waist and pulled me into a hug. His warm face nuzzling under my neck, and his warm temperature oozing out of his body and on to mines. "Lukey." I breathed out accidentally, making my heart race so fast I knew he could hear.

"You called me Lukey." He bemused amusingly and I rolled my eyes. "I-I'm sorry, Lace. I'm sorry for everything. For being an asshole, to what happened, and for all the shi-t I did." I didn't answer. We've been here before. He already apologized so many times I lost count. "This isn't how it's supposed to be, Lace. This isn't how I wanted it to be."

"You need to rest—"

"I lov—" His phone rang on the coffee table before he could even continue and both our eyes darted towards it... my heart getting torn into pieces as I remember it again. Of course... Of-fucking-course. How have I been so oblivious? So... careless? One hug. It only took one hug and I'm melting worst than a block of ice from his touch.

"You better answer that, Lukey." I say grudgingly, taking the comfort of his arms away from my waist and headed straight towards the kitchen. The phone ringing once again after it died down.

Calling... Cassie...

"Hey, Cass?"

Of course.