Unforgivable

Chapter Seven

"I don't know what to do. I'm all alone in this. I feel like I'd be judged no matter what I do. Everyone would wonder whose the father, then what would I say? David? Cos I can't. They'd think I was a right tart. I'd be treated harshly because of it. Especially by mum. I know for a fact she'd disown me. Probably think I'm fucking her boyfriend behind her back, but that's not it at all. I know she wouldn't listen to reason either," I sighed deeply, "you understand me though right?" Buster barked and licked my hand. I smiled weakly and stroked his belly, "of course you don't. Look at me talking to a bloody dog." I rubbed my face and rested my head back on the wall. It's been a day and I haven't left my room since. I couldn't even go school today, I felt way too sick. I only threw up not too long ago, I didn't know what to do with myself. I can't tell any of my mates either, or Nathan, or even Javon; everyone will judge me. I sniffed and wiped my tear. Buster rested his furry head on my leg.

"You have it easy don't ya?" I muttered. He whined and stuck his paw out. I stroked his ruffly fur absent-mindedly as I thought to myself. How the heck am I gonna be able to overcome this shamble of a situation? It's a bloody shame that's what it is, this could have happened to anyone else, but no, the unthinkable had to happen to Stacey. It's almost as if a cloud of unhappiness was hung over my head for a lifetime, like God wanted to punish me for no apparent reason at all. The small gap through my curtains shone the space only a little, producing a dim light in my room. I haven't eaten since forever, and I was hungry, yet I refused to stand up. Buster was my only companion right now, he was my mate: the person I could talk to a relieve everything built up on my chest. "That fucker can't know." I finally concluded, with such a strong passion that I scared even myself. Busters eyes peered into mine, almost as if he understood my pain and fury, but he could never experience it, cos God actually cares for him, and not me. I had work in a few hours, but skipping it was the best option right now, no way was I arriving at my job, just so I can throw up in the staff toilets, what the bloody hell was the use in that? "Fan-fucking-tastic." I sighed deeply and finally stood up with weak wobbly knees, trying to over come the need to topple back over. Buster watched me with curiosity in his eyes as I stumbled over to my window-sill. I pushed open the curtains, allowing sunlight to enter my room. I strained my eyes and opened the window, I needed air, and lots of it. My ringtone was heard almost instantly, I spun around towards my bed where my phone lay. I raised an eyebrow as I picked it up. Nathan, what did ya want mate?

Me: "Hey Nathe."

Nathe: "You feeling better now b?"

Me: "Ermm," I bit my lip, "A little under the weather but I should feel better tomorrow." I lied.

Nathe: "Ahh cool. So I won't be seeing you at work today?"

Me: "Afraid not. Sorry babe."

Nathe: "It's aight, just looking out for you. What you doing though?"

Me: "Relaxing, shouldn't you be in college?"

Nathe: "Day off."

Me: "Oh."

Nathe: "Mmm, I'll leave you now though."

Me: "Thanks."

Nathe: "Later b."

Me: "Bye." He hung up and I threw my phone back down in its rightful place. Nathan wasn't the only one to call. Rochelle and Sarah was also worried by my absence, and they had every right to be. No-one can know about this pregnancy, not even Rochelle, and she was the closest friend I had. I was somewhat relieved that I hadn't heard from Javon, I couldn't stand lying to him, so avoiding him was the best answer. There was a light knock on my door, causing me to snap my head in its direction. Buster perked up also, and we both stared waiting to find out who wanted to enter my room.