Hearts Without Chains

47.

Song of the chapter- Close As Strangers by 5 Seconds of Summer

~Only trust someone who can see these three things in you; the sorrow behind your smile, the love behind your anger, and the reason behind your silence~

Josephine-

Harry. That's all I could think of once my heart stopped banging against my ribs, and the guilt of what just happened only a few minutes ago made my chest hurt. When I finally force myself out of the now cold, uncomfortable water, which before was kind of nice, I almost jump out of my skin as Olivia says something to me, almost forgetting completely about both of them.

"What?" I ask her, my arms wrapping around my cold body.

"Where'd Tyler go?" She asks me, making me wrap my arms even tighter around myself.

"Um- I think- he said he was going to go refill his drink." I stammer.

Shawn's eyes flick to my drink which I had sat down next to Tyler's cup, which still remains there as well. She looks at me curiously.

"Oh, he must've forgotten it." I laugh shakily, shrugging my shoulders carelessly as I bend down and retrieve the two cups which are still almost filled to the brim.

Water trails behind me as I rush away from my two bestfriends, the cold drinks in my hand not helping the goosebumps that are all over my skin. I wish I had grabbed my towel before running away from them like that.

When I reach the patio door I take in a deep breath, wondering if I should even come in here, or even talk to Tyler about it for that matter. But we can't act like it didn't happen. And I remind myself I can't be mad at him, either. It was my fault as much as his, because I didn't do much to stop him.

I bite hard on the inside of my cheek as I walk inside, worried about letting water drip onto the floor of his house until I see there is already plenty there from him running away from me just as I had just done with Shawn and Liv.

I set the two cups down on the dining room table, before picking mine back up and gulping down as much as I can despite how cold I already am.

Tyler is nowhere to be seen in the living room or kitchen, so I walk down the hallway. I grab another towel to cover myself while walking down towards his bedroom where I bet he is. My knuckles tap against the door before I push it open a little, light being seen through the small crack that was already there.

He paces in his room when the door is fully opened, a towel held in his hands as he dries the back of his head with it. The door squeaks and he turns around, sighing deeply once he sees me.

"Are we going to talk about it?" I wonder, standing uncomfortably inside his doorway as he sits at the edge of his bed.

He lets out a laugh, one that's breathy and uncomfortable, "Uh, it wasn't supposed to happen. I don't know why I......." He shakes his head, trailing off mid sentence.

"I understand if you're mad though, because of Harry and all." He says, eyes flicking up to me.

I bite my cheek again. "It wasn't all your fault. Part of it lands on me too. So, I really can't be mad at you." I mumble, finding myself wishing I had done something to stop him. Because sadly, and selfishly, it would be a lot easier to tell Harry if it went down like that.

I groan out loud, turning my body so I can softly bang my forehead against the frame of the door, the thought of Harry making me feel terrible.

"I can't tell him." I sigh, not knowing if I said it loud enough for Tyler to even hear me. But I was mostly speaking to myself.