Unconditional

Chapter 12

🔺Top photo is Chances parents when they were younger. Then Chance Dad🔺

"Good morning church, today I just have one scripture. 1 Corinthians 10:21 which says "Ye cannot drink the cup of the Lord, and the cup of devils: ye cannot be partakers of the Lord's table, and of the table of devils. Today my message is for the Single and unmarried." The pastor said as he looked around the church.
"Single Christians always ask pastors and themselves if they are ready for marriage yet, so today my topic is "Am I Ready Yet" . Most of the time the answer to that question is NO, but I tell them that until they are ready for marriage, they shouldn't even be dating. How do I know if I am ready for marriage? You may ask your self. Most of us feel prepared, believing that being married will solve the problems of living in a broken and dysfunctional home. We have visions of a loving husband or wife who would care for us, love us, and save us from it all. The fact that we want it to happen must certainly be enough to make it work. Right? Unfortunately, however, the person whom we may have set our eyes on does not feel the same way about marriage; and they eventually go another way with someone else. We are devastated, of course, but learned that just wanting it to be didn't always make it so. God has only one person for you and you are not supposed to be testing each one until you find the right one. You are supposed to wait on God to bring you that man or woman. And if you are truly seeking Him on this one, you will know when the time comes. Ask your self these questions.Are you being the best you that you could be in every area of your life? God caused Adam to fall asleep at Eve's creation and it was only after she was complete that God stirred Adam awake and brought the two together. Both Adam and Eve were worked on and formed by God and were complete when they met. Will you be able to give up your career now if God tells you to do so? What if you lose your house that you have worked so hard for? What if God tests you financially and you lose your job? What if God kicks you out of being a ministry leader just to prove to Himself if you will surrender to Him or not? If you can't even fathom these thoughts and can't even say that you will surrender to God when it happens, then you are not fully surrendered to Him and are not ready for marriage. " There were a course of Amens that filledthe church house.

"Do you know how to cook? Do you know how to keep your house clean? Do you know how to give back rubs? Do you know how to take care of children? These are things that you have to prepare for before you even get married." The paster said wipping his face with a towel.

"Do you know how to love yourself? You need to learn to love yourself before you can ever give your love to another person. You need to learn how to receive love before you can get married and try loving someone else. You should learn to deal with insecurities so that they will not affect you relationship, maybe even share them with your partner. Often we find ourselves dealing with those insecurities that manifest themselves in our actions and speech. Please don't get me wrong, we aren't always feeling worthless and like there is no hope. God has started the healing process in us. We know that God is still working His refining fire in us." Again the was a course of 'Amen pastor' that filled the room along with clapping.

"Do you have any baggage? You shouldn't take old baggage into a relationship. You should be able to give the very best of yourself to your husband or wife and not bring insecurities to him or her. Your focus should be on loving him or her in the best way and healthiest way that you can." After he said that I smiled at Kerstin and squeezed her hand lightly.

"So imagine if you are not even thinking of marriage but you are already dating. What is that for? Of course we know that the world calls it a "need to be with somebody". It is trying to be intimate with someone without the commitment of marriage. Do you know who is like that? The devil! Satan is someone who always wants intimacy without commitment. Even if you are planning to get married next month, you are still not married until you make that vow before God and seal your commitment through the covenant you make in marriage. Only then are you allowed by God to be physically intimate with each other and consummate the marriage through the act. Any violation of this instruction from the Lord will ruin whatever relationship you have, no matter how beautiful it may seem. Until you get this, you are not ready for marriage. Until you learn to be celibate, you are not ready for marriage. Until you understand that your body belongs to the Lord and should not be shared with anyone except your future spouse and only after you are married, then you are not ready to be married. If you have not been unattached and celibate for at least a year, I don't think you are ready for marriage. Marriage is all about giving, serving, and sacrificing. It is not about getting what you need and want, but giving what your spouse needs and wants. It is about serving God. It is about being obedient to His Word. So if you can't be obedient to God when you are single, what makes you think that you can be obedient to Him when you are married? When you get married, you surrender yourself to God as to what He expects from you as a wife. You also surrender yourself to your husband and subordinate yourself to him. So until you are ready to surrender everything to Jesus at this point, you are not ready for marriage.
You know that there are still several areas that God needs to work on in your life. I want you to bear in mind that marriage is not just the joining of a man and a woman. It is the replica of God's relationship with His church. Everything you will do in marriage will make you draw closer or move away from this great plan of God. It can prepare you to be Jesus' future bride/ groom, or it can disqualify you. That's all I have for today church I hope I help clear that up for some of you single folks." The paster finished before taking his seat.