Safe

Chapter 12

Chapter 12

(Johns POV)

Mrs. Hudson made a delicious dinner for us. She cleaned up for us to, she says she's not our housekeeper and she's not. But what she is, is a mother to us, she takes care of us, and worries about us. She's about to leave and says "Goodnight boys, and Sherlock could you please put the body parts somewhere besides the fridge."

"Nope." He answers back. She smiles at me and I smile back, we're both thinking the same thing, we're glad he's back.

(Sherlocks POV)

I hear John close the door and walk in. I'm back in my old spot tuning my violin which is very out of tune. John sits down in his chair and let's out a sign. "So what have you been doing while you were...dead?" He asks

"Helping Mycroft with his work, fixing the British government, sitting around being bored. And just keeping an eye on you." I say with a smile. But I look at his face, he's looking away, and lost his smile. I said something wrong. "What did I say?"

"You've been watching me? This whole time you could see me, but I couldn't see you." He says in an angered tone.

"John, I couldn't just trust Moriarty's men would leave you alone." I explain to him.

"You don't get it, I've been depressed, sleep deprived, and almost commit suicide because I thought you were dead! And during that whole time of you being able to see me, you didn't even think of just at least letting me know you were alive!" He yells.

"John..." But I stop, I don't know what to say. Even though he doesn't understand the circumstances, or maybe he does, he makes a point. I should have told him, or texted, or something. I did this to him.

He gets up and heads to my, or our room. I wait a bit to follow. He's angry, it's what I first thought what would happen in the hospital that he would explode on me then. I walk in, his back is toward me, I change into my pajamas and robe and join him. We say nothing for the rest of the night and drift into sleep.

****

(Sherlock POV)

I already know what's happening, I'm in a dream. This doesn't happen much, most of the time my dreaming is replaced by my mind palace, but not this time. I'm standing in font of 221B Baker St. At first I don't know what's happening but it then occurs to me. I get the sense that John is in danger and I run upstairs to a locked door. I know what's happening, it's the day I save John, I try to tell myself it's a dream but the more time it takes to open the door the worry builds and I believe the dream. The door finally opened as I run to John but something stops me, a glass barrier, I can't reach him and he's dying. The glass fades but I'm to late and reach his lifeless body, I am to late.

I suddenly wake my body shot up, and heavy breathing. I turn the light on so I can see my surroundings. John starts to wake "Sherlock, what's happening?" I don't want to tell him, he'll worry about me, and I don't want that. "Sherlock?" He asks again.

"Sorry I didn't mean to wake you, it was nothing." I say, my voice sounding shaky. I reach back for the light, but he grabs my hand and brings it back. He's not going to let this go.

"Sherlock, what's wrong." He looks at me, and waits for me to answer. I don't want him to know, it's not something that I'm not use to talking about, it shows I'm weak. His fingers rub over my hand, trying to make me comfortable about it. "It's ok, I know what your going through and I know you need to talk about it."

"It... It was just a bad dream that's all, nothing else just a bad dream." I try to explain. I can see it in his eyes he's not going to give up, so I I get it over with. "Fine what happen was... You see it was when... And you were... And I couldn't... I couldn't do anything." My voice becomes weak. "And it was all my fault, I didn't... I didn't come in time... I didn't let you know I was, I let you believe I was dead." Like I had done at the hospital when he had his nightmare, he pulls me close into him and I burry myself into him. I bring my legs in so I am curled up into a ball, reminding me of my childhood of when my mother would do the same when I had a nightmare or was scarred.

His lips touching the top of my head and move just slightly away for him to speak. "This is going to take time, but we both need to talk about this, if there's one useful thing I've learned when seeing my psychiatrist is that it feels good to talk about things."

"I don't..."

He stops me. "I know you don't talk about what bothers you, but for me, do it."

I'd rather not but I'd do anything for him so I agreed. "Ok, for you John." I reach over to the light to turn it off and resume my position in Johns arms. I fall back asleep with no more nightmares.