Femslash February 2019 - Harry Potter Femslash Oneshot Collection

Day 7 - Less like a Joke and More like the Truth - Pansmione

Prompt: Disaster

Pairing: Hermione Granger/Pansy Parkinson

Rating: Mature

Word Count: 1,286

Summary: Hermione is working from home when Pansy barges in to rant about the latest disaster to befall a Charity Ball she's trying to host. Like most of Pansy's rants, it's short lived but leaves her with plenty of steam to blow off.

Tags: EWE, Post-Hogwarts, Foreplay

Less like a Joke and More like the Truth (But She'll Worry About That Later)

"It's a disaster," Pansy said dramatically as she pushed past Hermione the moment she opened the door to her flat. She then proceeded to walk over to her sofa and collapse dramatically onto it.

Hermione rolled her eyes and shut the door, muttering to herself, "By all means, do come in."

"An unmitigated disaster!"

Hermione closed her eyes and counted to ten. "What's a disaster?" she asked, knowing full well she would do better to ignore her dramatics.

Pansy scowled over at her as if she should know already. "Daphne's mother has suddenly decided to renovate. The house is completely gutted."

With a sigh, Hermione waited. Pansy stared at her.

"That ball!" she hissed. "We can't very well have a charity ball in a room undergoing renovations!"

"Oh bloody hell," Hermione muttered. "This is the third time you've changed venues. Just rent the function room in the Ministry and be done with it!"

Pansy stood abruptly. "The function room in the Ministry? Are you serious?"

That had been a tactical error, Hermione decided quickly. It was better to be around a Pansy that was pissed at someone else than to be the target of her ire.

With a hysterical laugh, Pansy gestured at her. "Why am I dating such a—"

"Oi, watch it," Hermione interrupted with a sharp look.

Pansy glared back at her. Hermione almost wanted her to say it, just to see the look on her face when she kicked her out of her flat.

After a few tense moments, Pansy groaned and her posture sagged. Hermione mentally congratulated herself for warding off another fight about her lack of interest in social affairs. Her commonness.

"The dimensions of the function room are all wrong," Pansy whined. "I'll have to start over from scratch. It took months to hash out all the details for the Greengrass Estate. I'll have to send out new invites. Change the decoration plans. Cancel all the orders because they just won't work now and the number of attendees might change again. I have to start all over again!"

Hermione counted to ten. "That really is a tad unfair."

"I really can't stand Daphne's mother. She should know better!" Pansy hissed, flopping back onto the sofa.

Hermione looked longingly at the report she'd been working on, spread out over the coffee table. She was well ahead of schedule, but still...she could have worked for a few more hours.

"I can't hear another word about it," Pansy decided. "I'm taking two days off before diving back in. I'll still have enough time."

Hermione glanced at the clock. They'd have to order in dinner, she still hadn't gone shopping like she'd meant to.

"Probably for the best," she murmured.

Pansy breathed heavily for a few moments and Hermione almost laughed. Pansy winding down from a huff was endlessly amusing even if the huff itself was bloody irritating.