The Breaking The Healing

Deep Deep Thoughts.

I prayed to God to have his attention back again, feel appreciated by him as much as I know it's wrong I can't control it.

I'm honestly feeling great amazing and blessed as well, I truly have great people in my life who shows actual real feelings for me appreciates and respects me for who I am. I am thankful. I am living my best life I am achieving my dreams, stepping up.

he still is on my mind, i'm convincing myself he's not, he is he fucking is.

He really is an awful person. He made me feel so insecure when I do not deserve any of this. I deserve to have full confidence. I don't need to be perfect to be loved.

He still is on my fucking mind, get out please get out.

God how bad I am waiting for your call so I can finally face you and have the damn ability to stand up for my fucking self. Will you call? Will you? Am I ever going to say what I have inside? Am I? I really am dying to let it all out, all. I can't wait, I really don't want to keep it built up in me.
Is he gonna ever notice me? talk to me? call me? message me? will he?
Too many questions without damn answers TOO MANY UNANSWERED QUESTIONS.
Pain really changes people.
Stop overthinking.
He still doesn't give a damn, moments seconds hours days are passing, how sad.
all the lies. total bullshit. sad.
Did I ever do anything wrong to someone to be hurt this bad? to get fucked in this way? I don't remember. I don't think I even have the ability to hurt someone in this way.
Why, WHY.

Why, what did I do wrong to you? what was your intention into breaking me? breaking my heart in this way? What did I do wrong? What did I do to push you away from me? What did you see in me? What others are better than me in? How could you do be like this! How could you break me in this way? I wanna talk to you so bad. so damn bad. I'm holding myself every single day from doing it because my pride was fucking gone many times and it's the only thing I still have. I can't wait for the day I will get over you. Are you ever going to talk to me again? Notice me? Want me or love me? Am I even on your mind? Are you thinking of me? Do you even give a damn about me? Days are passing and you're still not giving a single fuck.
It's time to stop. I am emotionally and mentally destroyed.

Yep, stop giving a fuck about people who doesn't give a damn about you. They will realise what they lost one day for sure. It will hurt but I sure as hell will get over it. I don't need people who doesn't need me, doesn't give a fuck about me or my feelings.