wicked//punk l.h

chapter seventeen

everyone has a part inside
that aches with a sadness
sometimes you cannot hide.
||courtney peppernell||

h a r m o n y

BEING IN NEW YORK for New Years was the best gift anyones gotten me. I had a wild night filled with lots of alcohol and faded memories. Trey, Kaaya and I watched the ball drop, then we all went to Trey's house to give ourselves tattoos.

Us being far from sober, it wasn't the smartest idea. I tattooed Kaaya, she tattooed Trey while he tattooed me.

I gave her a simple 'cry' on the side of her thumb. She gave Trey a fairly impressive knife on his ribs. While Trey... well I'm not sure what he tried. Even once back home a few days later, I still starred at the strange design on my wrist.

My dad said he's fix it once I came up with a coverup tattoo idea, but I'd have to wait for a week or so. I also asked if I could get a few more and he was okay with that. I knew he wouldn't let me get anything I would regret and he knew it too.

Soon enough, a week passed and I was sitting on the familiar leather chair while waiting for my dad to finish setting up.

"So, I haven't seen Luke for a while. You guys have a fight or something?" my dad asked.

He had no idea that what he said hit me hard. I managed to push Luke out of my mind for the rest of Christmas break, but everything just seemed to hit me right there.

"He's been busy," I lied.

He just nodded, then started fixing the still unknown design Trey had put on me. Then, he moved onto the three tattoos I wanted. I couldn't wait for my ideas so I convinced him to let me get all three. Well four if you include the cover up.

The coverup was a simple tree with some birds. It wasn't anything special. Just a cool idea I found online.

My next idea was having a pinky promise sign kind of thing on one arm, then having the gun you make with your hands on the other.

Promises have always been very important to me. I keep my word. I don't cancel last minute and I absolutely hate when people do that. Or when they break any promise. It hits me in a place where I didn't know existed.

So I decided to get this because of course, promises are a big deal to me, but if you break them I will probably go crazy and I may consider pulling a gun.

Okay probably not, but I won't be happy.

My last idea was dedicated to my brother. It would be a spaceship with those beams coming down right above my heart. On the top it'll say 'get in loser' and on the bottom it'll have my brothers death date.

After hours in the chair, my dad was finally finished and they looked amazing. I was real happy with how they all turned out. I ended up paying for half while my dad covered the rest.

The first person I wanted to show was Luke. But it hurt knowing I couldn't just show up.

Even if I did. What would I say?

Hey, sorry for disappearing all break but I'm back. Wanna pick up where we left off?

I doubt he would accept that. Anyway, he was probably spending time with Ayia and focusing on his actual relationship. I wouldn't be surprised if he decided to not let me back in his life.

I asked my dad to drop me off at Chayse's since I really wanted to show off my new tats. He was honestly the only person left even if he wasn't the best to me.

{warning: abuse}

"Harm, what're you doing here?" Chayse asked, opening the door. He looked as if he just woke up, even if it was late afternoon.

"I just got new tats and I wanted to show them off to someone," I smiled, letting myself in. We sat down on the couch as I took off my shirt to expose the fresh ink.

"Did you show Luke yet?" he didn't seem as excited as I was about them. Instead he was more pissed off.

I threw my oversized tee shirt back on. "No."

"You two are close. Why not show him before me? Obviously you'd be more excited for the tatted up dude instead of someone who doesn't give a fuck about them," he spat with anger.

I rolled my eyes. This whole fighting over Luke was getting annoying to me. All Chayse knows is that we were best friends. Now, we weren't on speaking terms.

"Chayse, I told you I don't talk to him no more," I said, hurt filling my voice. It honestly stung a bit talking about Luke as if something epic happened between us, but in reality it was just me cutting him off with no reasoning.

"Ayia came to talk to me the other day."

I raised an eyebrow. I quickly pieced together all the information I had and wanted to leave this situation.

Luke must've told Ayia and she would no doubt run to Chayse and spill.

"You fucking lied to me and screwed around with that useless fuck." It was no lie to anyone on this street that Chayse was angry. Heck, you could even hear him in China.

"Look, I know I messed up," I started my explanation, but he jumped up and cut me off.

"Damn right you messed up. I gave you everything and you go and screw Hemmings? Of all people, fucking Hemmings!"

I stood up as well. "I didn't sleep with him, okay? All it was, was a kiss. That's it."

"With Hemmings. I knew he would try to fuck this up and you let him! God, you're such a fucking whore!"

And that's when he started to take his anger out physically. It started with him punching walls, making big holes, then it moved to me as a punching bag.

I hadn't cried that much in my life. I felt so weak.

I had no one at this point and nothing anyone could do would help me. I was stuck.

So, I let Chayse bruise me as much as he wanted.

He eventually stormed out of the house and left me alone. I held a hand to my new tattoo dedicated to Andy.

"Take me with you."