Blank Canvas

March 1, 2019

Absolute Silence

There's nothing more exasperating than climbing. Climbing so high, where you can't feel the tip of your nose, because the air is so brisk. You take off your third jacket, because your body is roasting from the extra layers.

Seeing your breath when you look up, to see how far you have left. It's exciting, and despite the struggle you continue. Because you know, that the view from the top was said to be spectacular.

Each step, each grasp with your equipment, or bare hands, closer to the peak. That was the reason you still keep moving.

At that point, my journey was almost over. Five years of training, three months of climbing, I was almost to the top. The view was already spectacular, when I had my breaks,I took a second to look to take it all in.

I took a brief second to admire it, before I finished my journey.

This is it, I said in my head. The moment I've been waiting for.

At last, I grabbed the platform at the top of the mountain, and pulled myself up. I was becoming lightheaded from the elevation. I went into my backpack, carrying my essentials, and grabbed an oxygen tank and mask. Placing it on my face, I took a deep breath, closing my eyes.

It was a strange feeling, hearing nothing but the sound of my own breathing. I reopened my eyes, and took in my surroundings, clouds moving with the wind, noticing they were mostly beneath me. I felt as though I were flying. And finally, for the first time in my life, there weren't any idiots harassing me, and there were no questions. I didn't give answers. I was by myself, alone, on the top of a mountain.

I looked down, upon the three month journey, wondering how in the heck I. Just. Did. That.

I smiled beneath my mask, still inhaling the freshness of oxygen I lacked most of the way up. I sat down on the top of the mountain, and closed my eyes once again. Slowing my breathing, so I could hear the nothingness around me. Peaceful, serene bliss. An absolute nothingness. A brisk wind blew across my barely exposed skin, causing a shiver to go down my spine. How long should I stay here? I pondered, enjoying this for once. Knowing that once I returned, I'd be named wonderfully talented, and a skilled climber. Questions forming, and pondering eyes. How I'd trained for the past five years, just awaiting for the moment to be recognized.

I didn't want it though. I just wanted to enjoy this. In this moment, right now. In absolute silence.