Dear Renjun

thirteen

i miss 2ParkJi, what about you? announcement posted on my wall ;) my baby ningning on the multimediaaa!!
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"geudaega chagawodo nareul tto mireonaedo
miun mankeum ureobogo aesseo teoreonaebwado
maeum hanguseogen gaseum hankyeoneneun
ajikdo geudael geurineun naega itjyo"

Even though you're cold, even though you push me away
Even though I cried till I hated you, even though I tried to brush you off
In one corner of my heart, in one part of my heart
There is still a part of me that draws you out

Renjun sang the first verse, not bothering to look at the audience. He was just looking at the girl standing beside him. He just confessed, he's supposed to be happy, but he doesn't know what or how to feel.

"It's hard for me to forget you
eotteoke gieogi shwipge ichyeojilkkayo
It's hard for me to hate you
eotteoke naega geudaereul miwohalkkayo"

It's hard for me to forget you
How can the memories be easily forgotten?
It's hard for me to hate you
How can I hate you?

Ningning closed her eyes when Renjun sang the lyrics. They were hitting her, hard. It breaks her heart how her crush confessed to her, and yet she didn't answer.

She took a breath before singing the next part.

"dwireul dorabomyeon neul gateun moseubeuro
geudaereul jikigo itneun saram itjyo"

If you turn around, there will be someone
Who is protecting you, always in the same way

''I'm willing to be that someone, Renjun-ah..."

"I'm more than willing to be that someone who'd always protect you, Ningning..."

"It's hard for me to forget you
eotteoke gieogi shwipge ichyeojilkkayo
It's hard for me to hate you
eotteoke naega geudaereul miwohalkkayo"

It's hard for me to forget you
How can the memories be easily forgotten?
It's hard for me to hate you
How can I hate you?

Ningning looked at the guy beside her. He was also passionately singing. If only you knew, Renjun...

She didn't had the chance to say that she likes him too. They were already called to perform on stage. Second, she remembered the unread letters.

And even if it's impossible, she wants him to know that she's yz. The one who's giving him letters all along. The one who's admiring him from afar.

"gaji marayo ajik gaji marayo
bonael junbiga ajik andwaetjanayo"

Don't go, don't go yet
I'm still not ready to let you go

I won't ever let go....

"Too hard for me
Too hard for me
Too hard for me"

Too hard for me
Too hard for me
Too hard for me

The song was about to end. Renjun walked closer to her and placed his arm around his shoulders, not even caring about how she would react.

Their eyes locked.

"It's hard for me to forget you
eotteoke gieogi shwipge ichyeojilkkayo
It's hard for me to hate you
eotteoke naega geudaereul miwohalkkayo"

It's hard for me to forget you
How can the memories be easily forgotten?
It's hard for me to hate you
How can I hate you?

🎸

Dismissal came and things became awkward as ever. After their performance, Ningning immediately got off the stage, not even sparing Renjun a single glance.

He got hurt at how she acted. It felt like he was stabbed multiple times.

He was with Donghyuck, Jeno, Jaemin, and Jisung, waiting for their ride to go home. A car honked, getting their attention. They stood up, got their things and headed towards the car.

Renjun turned his head towards the side and saw Ningning walking towards their car.

He took a deep breath before calling out her name. "Ningning!"

The said girl looked at Renjun.

"I'll wait for you. No matter how long." He said before stepping into their mini-van.

"Renjun, what happened back there? What's with you and your monologues?" Jaemin asked.

The car started moving.

Renjun buried his face in his palms. "I confessed."

"You what? To whom?" Jaemin's eyes widened.

"I confessed to Ningning, and I didn't get any answer."

"That's impossible." Jisung whispered to himself. He was seated beside the driver, that's why his hyungs couldn't see his face. "Hyung, did you do something stupid again? Why would she reject Huang Renjun?"

"Renjun-hyung confessed? and you rejected him?" Jisung texted her.

"Not that I rejected him... I just didn't reply.."

Jisung mentally face-palmed. They were all right about Renjun liking Ningning. Now that he confessed, he thought that everything would be better—well, he thought.

"I thought you love hyung?"

"Jisung, loving someone is different from liking someone." Jisung could have sworn he heard Ningning sigh inside his mind.

"So you don't like/love my Renjun-hyung anymore?" He wanted his hyung and his friend to be happy.

"I do, Jisung... you know I do... but the letters... I want him to know that it's me, Jisung... without anyone telling him."

"Then tell him."

"You don't have to tell me. I'll do it myself."

— tbc.