Husbands But Not

15: Throwback

A/N: Just read till the end and you'll understand.

Evan

I was panicking.

"Evan you're panicking." No shit. I was in my bedroom. Not our bedroom, but mine; the one we didn't share. I wasn't in it for long, since I hadn't really been in this house for much.

I was gonna lose it anyway.

What if I got upset?

What if I didn't wanna be with him in one room?

What if I needed space?

What if I just wanted to be alone?

That was the purpose of that room, and I was gonna lose it.

I mean, sure, I was expected to raise a child at the age of 17, but like, the room.

"I'm okay, " I lied. "It's all good." Nothing was good.

"Your face is red, you're shivering, and you're literally standing on the bed." He said. He was right. I dropped down to my bed.

Or was it his bed?

Our bed?

"What are we going to do?" I cried. I was so worried. This didn't just mark a new beginning, it marked a whole new milestone in our life.

The dark circles underneath his eyes were a clear indication that he, too, hasn't slept all night.

It was the first time we each sleep in our separate rooms since we got together. The room felt way too big of a sudden.

"I honestly don't know, but we'll figure it out, right?" We. "We always do." he reassured me. I needed the reassurance now more than ever.

I lay down across the bed. His bed. Our bed. "What about school?" My question came out like thin ice. School gave him anxiety the most. It brought back all his past life and shoved it in his face. "They barely stopped talking about us being together despite being step brothers."

"Well they're wrong." he said, anger rising with every word. Not at me, at the world.

"You quit the football team." I added.

"Football can burn." he was in my face, as if daring me to add one more thing to the fire before the flames take us down.

"You're cute when you're angry." I poked his cheek. He broke down into a laugh and kissed me, smiling against my face.

"I don't know what we got ourselves into, but I never have a doubt about anything I do if it's with you." He always knew the right things to say. I just ate food and painted on random surfaces.

Though like this bed, we both had our hearts, and sometimes we liked to share them.

"I just don't like how it's always us who have to stand out from the crowd?" I whisper against his face. He smells of apples. Tastes like them too.

His eyebrows tighten and he sits up. "We'll change it."

"How?"

"After Christmas break, I'm joining the football team again. You'll go back to painting amazing canvases in Ms. Parks' class, and we'll show the whole school that we're doing nothing wrong. You have nothing to be ashamed of, and neither have I." I felt so proud of him, even though I was kind of lusting over him.

"And what about Noah?"

"Noah is your son as much as he is mine, and we'll raise him together."

I wished we could get married right then.

"Our own little corny family." I gushed, imagining how adorable it'll be to have our own son, who we can raise beautifully.

"We don't have to be married, you know. We can still be husbands."

"But not?" I asked.

"Yes. We're husbands, but not. And I love you."

"I love you too, Zac." I hugged him and he lifted me up, making our way to the dining room for supper. Deep down I knew, with mom's and Zac's dad's help, we'll raise a very caring son, Noah, who won't stand for anything wrong in the world. Deep down, I knew that I'll always be Evan, and Zac will always be there to carry me places.

A/N: More soon.