Grounded For Life

Serving Jail Time... Over A Joke

Soon, I look over and see my mom in the cell next to me.
"Mom?!"
"I wish I could beat your ass so hard right now!" She yelled.
"Listen, it's not my fault you locked me in a closet!"
"But it WAS your fault for everything that led up to that!"
"Can you just listen to me for once?" I begged.
"Why should I? You got me arrested!"
"No, YOU got you arrested! Everything that happened, only happened because nobody in this god damn world can take the truth or even listen to me!"
"But you still started it by calling a girl a whore."
"I know, but can you at least hear me out on how bullshit it is that I got suspended for 2 months all because I called her ONE name?"
"I know it is, but it's even more bullshit that we're in prison because of a ton of things that could've easily been avoided." She argued. Why are you even here anyway?"
"Remember Adam Gontier?" I asked. "Yeah...?"
"I finally met him, but he decided to be a dick. He was also the reason you had to come out and carry me in earlier. Well, that cop that brought me in is apparently his cousin, so he got offended when I jokingly said I wanted to kill him."
"Did you tell the cop you were joking?"
"No."
"Why? It could've saved you from being arrested."
"Same reason you didn't know the rest of what happened until now, because he wouldn't listen."
"Okay well... There's nothing you can do now, so I hope you like living in a tiny box and eating nothing but mold now that you're not living in that 'shit hole of a house' anymore."
"K... Thanks for not caring again, even after all the times you've said I could tell you anything."
"It's not that I don't care (My name), otherwise I wouldn't be listening to you!"
"Yeah, you're listening to me now for the first time in however the fuck many months."
"Look, I'm gonna try to call someone to come bail us out, but unless you want to be left here, you'd better drop the attitude!" She said as she called her friend. "Hello?" He sighed annoyed. "Hey." My mom said. "How come you weren't at work today?" He asked. "I'm in jail." My mom responded. "And why...?" He asked again. "Look, that part isn't important right now. Can you just please come and get me out of here?"
"Why should I?"
"Uh... Because I'm your friend?"
"Yeah, but I also don't want to get involved in bailing out a criminal."
"Did you just call me a criminal?"
"Yes, I did, because people don't usually go to jail for no reason!"
"I'll tell you why I got put in jail if you come get me out."
"I don't know if I should."
"Please?"
"What will you give me in return?"
"I'll tell you honestly why I got put in jail."
"Yeah, but you might lie about it, so that's not good enough. Try again."
"Well what do you want?"
"I want you to stop calling me."
"And I want to get out of here, but guess what. We don't always get what we want in life!" My mom argued, but then her "friend" hangs up, so she calls him back. "Listen, if you don't stop calling me, I'm going to block your number."
"What do you want? I'll give you anything! Just please come get me out!" My mom begged.
"I want a billion dollars." He demanded.
"And what makes you think I have that kind of money?"
"Aw, that's too bad! Guess I can't bail you out then."
"Please?"
"Nope, sorry."
"Alright, I'll give you a billion dollars."
"And a Lamborghini?"
"Seriously?"
"Yes, I want a Lamborghini and a billion dollars or I'm not coming!"
"Fine." My mom sighed.
"And you promise you'll have them by next week?"
"I can't promise anything as I can't just pull that out of my ass, but I can certainly try."
"K, guess I'm not bailing you out then..."
"But I said I would!"
"Yeah, but you didn't promise."
"Alright, I promise I'll have your billion dollars and a Lamborghini by next week! Now can you come get me out of here?"
"Fine, but this is the only time." He said as he hung up.
"Who was that?" I asked.
"A guy that works with me."
"A guy?!"
"Yes, a guy. You've got a problem with that or something?"
"I wouldn't usually, but right now, yes."
"And why...?"
"Uh... Because you JUST kicked (My stepdad's name) out 5 hours ago or some shit?"
"What does this have to do with (My stepdad's name)?"
"It doesn't. I just don't want to be in a car with my mom and some guy the same night she got out of her last relationship."
"He's my friend (My name)."
"Fine, but if I notice anything even a little suspicious, I'm calling you out!"