Call Me Lost, Child (On Hold Until Summer)

Chapter 19: Kiss of Tears

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A/N: I smell tears and romance. Will be fully edited in a day or so, so please forgive any typos or anything that may happen to be grammatically incorrect.

Chapter 19: Kiss of Tears

His arms tightened as he held me close. Gabriel had to carry me back. After seeing someone I considered a friend at one point holding a head of a normal human boy, caused me to have a case of PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder) and my body just gave up on me.

"Gabe, please don't let him get me," I whispered so quietly that I wasn't entirely sure if I said it out loud or not. Even the crunching of the leaves underneath his feet appeared to be louder then my own shaken voice. The trees around us weren't as thick as before, so I knew we were nearly at the house.

"Don't worry A, we'll fix this. I promise." His said back as gently as possible. I felt like an escapee from a mental hospital.

"How?" I felt the tears travel down my cheeks. "How does one fix this?" I sobbed into his shirt. Just his scent brought comfort to me. His grip on me tightened and he continued up the partially steep hill.

"One doesn't. God does."

"Would God allow that boy to be taken and killed?" I asked through the waterfall that was pouring over my lips now causing my words to become much more blurred than previous.

Gabe sighed and walked me through the front doors of my home, or so I called it since I moved here. He set me down on Ruth's large dark brown sofa and got me a cold glass of water. I couldn't even touch it. I all but watched the water race down the outside of the glass.

"A, God didn't leave that boy to die."

"How would you know?" I muttered. Sure, God didn't give off the whole 'I don't care' vibe, but did I know enough? Why didn't He save him?

"I knew him. His name is Brad," Gabe began. He sighed and clasped his hands together while his body leaned towards me. "He gave his life up a long time ago. He joined this cult, did a bunch of rituals, and ultimately, cursed God. I prayed for him and I went to him but he continued to deny God."

"So God gave up on him?" I asked, still not believing that an all loving God would give up on a lost boy.

"Of course not, He sent many more people to save his soul."

"Then what happened?" He was beating around the bush, I felt like chopping it down and making him get to the point already.

Gabe hesitated.

"I was sent to talk to him again, something in  my gut told me to since last night, but I shoved that thought away. The last time I spoke to him, he insulted Ruth and called Maggie a slut. I didn't want to see his face again. Then when I finally couldn't take it anymore, I left the house in search of him when I ran into you." There was a hint of anger in his voice.

There was a long silence as I knew what he was saying. He blamed himself. His breathing became more shallow and forced as he stared behind me at nothing. His eyes turned a light pink as did his nose. The hair on his head moved softly because he shook it, he shook his head in defeat.

"I could have saved him today, Akila." His voice was thick with tears. Then he stood up. "I could have saved him!" He yelled. His arms flailed angrily seconds before they grabbed his own face and covered it.

I got out of my seat and tried to calm him. "Gabriel, it's not your-" I began crossing the distance between us. Anything to help him, I thought.

"Don't say it! You were so ready to blame God, why not me huh!? Why aren't you blaming me!?" He basically screamed. I could imagine the tears falling down his cheeks stinging him like acid as a reminder of what he could've done, but didn't do.

I looked down at my hands. "Because I don't know God all that well, I was confused... but Gabe, I know you." It was true. The only things I knew about God was what my gut told me, what people told me, what Genesis told me, but it was all in a week. I don't really know Him.

"No you don't. The Gabe you know wouldn't do something like this. I'm so disgusted with myself," he muttered angrily.

"Don't be. You didn't know."

"That's no excuse."

"That's plenty. Please don't blame yourself." The thought of that dead boy was enough to make me fall in a depression for days, but blaming myself would kill me. I needed Gabe. If he killed himself, he'd be like my mom. I already lost her, I needed him.

"I don't know if can change how I feel."

"At least try," I begged, tears fell down my cheeks again.

His black hair was ruffled, his shirt crinkled, and his eyes were bloodshot. He stared at me and shot his arms foreword. I squealed in shock as he pulled me closer without straining himself.

"I don't know how." He finally said.

"I'll teach you." I whispered. I couldn't help but stare in his blue green eyes.

His hands were just above my hips as he stared at me. Then without a second thought he pulled me into a tight hug. My arms reached up to grip his back and we just stood there, breathing.

"No wonder they're after you. Even after the crap they put you through, you're still good. You're better than me, A. I would have broken by now."

"Who said I wasn't broken?" I asked quietly as all the memories of being drugged, hit, and accused; rushed back into my head. He lifted a credulous eyebrow and I rolled my eyes. "I'm not all great as you make me to be Gabe."

"Who said you weren't perfect?"

"The Ten Commandments." I chuckled, but he remained serious.

"Who said you weren't perfect to me?" He restated.

My smile fell off my face as I realized how close he actually was. He smiled at me, his usual boyish smile and I blushed heavily. Then he grasped my cheek and pulled me close. My eyes began to shut on their own accord and I felt his breath on my lips.

"We're home!" Maggie yelled. Gabe and I jumped apart like ninjas. I fell into the sofa behind me just as Maggie and Ruth walked into the room with ten shopping bags in each hand. Ruth gasped as she took in the appearance of Gabe and I.

"Gabe, Akila! What's wrong. Why does it look like you two have been crying?"

"I'll tell you in a second, but can we get a quick moment alone?" Gabe asked politely.

"Sure, but hurry up. I want to know what happened." She said sternly, carefully scanning our bodies for injuries.

"Of course." Gabe replied easily. Maggie glanced between the two of us as if she knew something, but continued to follow Ruth out of the room.

"Come here." His deep voice gave me chills.

"I'm quite fine here." I squeaked. I glanced up at him and saw a large smirk on his face. His long legs found their way to me faster than I expected.

"Why so nervous A?" He whispered.

"I don't know what you're talking about. I'm not n-nervous." Someone slap me now.

"Oh really now?"

"Really." I gulped.

His face came closer to me. His oversized calloused hand gripped my cheek and wiped away a dry tear from earlier. I could feel him get closer, but my eyes were tightly shut, so I wasn't fully sure.

Then I felt soft pillowy lips barely graze my cheek where my tear had been.

"Even when you cry, you're perfect to me." He whispered before moving away and walking out the door to go speak to Ruth.

That boy would be the death of me.