Only You (Sequel to Good Enough)

8

Perrie

"Australia is so beautiful!" I say to Jade. She smiles at me and says "You are so beautiful." I blush slightly and smile at Jade.

I can tell that she is trying to be the best wife that she can be. I wish that I could just move past the fact that she cheated on me, but I couldn't get it out of my head.

We had gotten to our hotel around an hour ago and I was staring out the window at the beautiful scenery in our view. "What do you want to do?" Jade asks me softly. I notice that she's staring at me. "I want to go surfing." I say to her.

"But you don't know how to surf." Jade says while laughing slightly. "I'll have to learn then." I say to her while walking past her to the door. "I'll be your cheerleader." She says while following me. It's so hard to tell her that I just wanted space. I didn't want to hurt her.

I left the room and began quickly walking down the hall to the elevators. "Perrie slow down." I hear Jade say to me as she's trying to keep up. I pretend to not hear her and keep walking at my same pace.

Jade catches up to me as we are waiting for the elevator to bring us down to the main floor. "Are you trying to avoid me. I'll do anything you want." She tells me. I shake my head no and am excited to hear the elevator ding. I enter the elevator and Jade follows me.

The door shuts and Jade faces me. "What can I do Perrie?" I turn to her and sigh. "Nothing Jade. I tried to make everything feel as normal but it won't. It never will. I think when we get home we should spend some time apart." I tell her. It pains me with every word that comes out of my mouth.

"Do you want a divorce?" She asks sadly. I can feel tears forming in my eyes when she asks that. "No. I just don't want to be with you. I need to heal on my own but don't want to ruin this trip for you." I tell her honestly. I never want to be the person that hurts others.

"Perrie." She says softly. I shake my head and walk away from her. I can barely look at her before thinking of the fact she slept with another woman. "Perrie." She says a bit louder trying to get me to turn around. It takes my whole body to fight the urge to turn around and face her.

"I'll leave. I don't want you to be sad. You deserve to enjoy the honeymoon. I'll take the first flight to England that I can find." She says to me. I turn around and sigh. I can tell she's trying to make me happy. "I think that'll be best." I tell her before turning around and walking toward the beach. I don't look back to see if she's staring at me. I want to enjoy Australia as it is one of my favorite places on Earth.

I walk toward the beautiful beach. I instantly feel better hearing the crashing waves of the ocean. I find a spot and put my towel down to sit on it. I am sitting there relaxing before seeing a shadow blocking the sun. "Hey can you move?" I ask before opening my eyes.

"No. Perrie you can't just expect me to leave you here without me." The voice says. I instantly know it's Jade.

"I'm not a baby Jade. I am a grown woman. I can take care of myself." I tell her before looking up and staring at her.

"I made a mistake and you have no idea how much I wish I could take it back." She says to me. Here we go again I think to myself.

"It's not just some mistake Jade! You slept with another woman! You slept with someone I considered to be one of my best friends!" I scream at her. I don't care that we're in public at this point. She can't seem to understand that what she did hurt me.

"It was a drunken mistake." She says calmly. "I don't love her. It was just sex. It wasn't what we have." She says to me.

"How is that supposed to make me feel better? It's like I wasn't enough for you Jade! You promised me that you wouldn't hurt me like him, but you did. You're just as bad as he was." I tell her coldly. I see her face drop as she knows exactly who I'm talking about.

"Don't you dare compare me to him. I took care of you. I showed you true love Perrie." She says to me. Her voice breaks when she says true love. I swallow the lump in my throat to try and keep from crying again.

"True lovers don't cheat on each other! I can't stop thinking about it Jade. Clearly I wasn't enough." I start rambling on as I feel extremely angry and upset by this all over again. "You're just as bad as him Jade! Except you hurt me more than he ever could!"
Suddenly I feel a wave of anxiety taking over me. I feel tears falling from my cheeks and can feel my chest tightening.

I start to shake slightly from all the tension that had been building inside of me. I can feel it all coming out in the form of a panic attack.

I feel Jade sit next to me and pull me into her arms. I don't resist her as I feel too weak. She whispers soothing things in my ear and plays with my hair softly. I begin to calm down as I try to breathe normally. She knows exactly how to calm my panic attacks.

All the anxiety surrounding Jade's affair finally had taken over me. I wish that I could express how much it hurt me. I wish she knew how it felt, but I could never do that to Jade.

I began to calm down after a few minutes by just hearing Jade's soothing voice and the ocean.

"Do you really think I'm like him?" I hear Jade's voice ask me. I can tell she's hurt by my statements. I sigh and look up at her.

"He hurt me physically while you hurt me emotionally. You've always been so gentle and patient with me, but when I found out that you cheated it was honestly the worst pain in my life." I tell her.

Those weren't the words that Jade hoped for I'm sure if it, but she needed to know how much it hurt. She needed to know why I still brought it up. It seemed like old news to her, but to me it's on every highlight in my brain. I cannot stop thinking about every aspect of it.

While I was so wrapped up in my head, I notice that Jade is still here. Her arms are still wrapped around me. She is still letting me rest my head on her shoulder. She isn't saying anything to me, but she's still here holding me together.

I know that she wants to leave and she wants to cry her eyes out after hearing my words, but she doesn't. Instead she stays with me on the beach and continues to calm me and make sure that I'm okay.

This is the first time since the cheating incident that I have felt true love from Jade. I look up at her and see her staring into the ocean. I want to tell her that I still love her and would do anything for her, but I don't. I bite my tongue and think of ways that we can rebuild our relationship.

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Alright! There's some hope for Jerrie! Hope you guys like this chapter and I know that it's been a long time!

Hopefully I can get some chapters out in the next few weeks as we are all pretty much stuck in quarantine.

I also have new stories that I'm working on that are (in my opinion) much better than this. I started working on Good Enough when I was like 13 or 14 I think. I have matured a lot since then and my writing has gotten better