The Confessions of Heart

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(The whole theme song of this chapter is Halo by Beyonce- Fingerstyle Cover by James Bartholomew) You can find it on Youtube! It's beautiful

After tearing up for an hour or so, I stop and look at Medusa who is looking at me as I lie on her lap on the bed

"I heard every-word" Medusa finally says

"I know, it's sad" I say while letting out a sigh

"The saddest part is you staying silent, that is not the Nova that I know" her words shakes my soul and I get up from her lap and sit on her side with my knees folded, touching my chest.

"Where is your strength?" she asks me as I begin to ponder on her words

"I seem to have lost it a while back" I say as I shut my eyes hard enough for a tear to fall down

"You never loose your strength, you are born with it. Especially you!" Medusa's voice raises as she speaks passionately while pointing her finger

"Look at you! What have you done to yourself? You let him get away from calling you a whore and slapping you!" She says in anger, "The Nova I know would have given him one back and left him forever" she says

I take a trip down to my memory lane, and I remember that version of me

The Fearlessly strong me.....

The Utterly competitive me.....

The never giving up on anything me.......

The happy me... I remember all of me and the worst loss that I have had since my life went upside down was the loss of myself. I wish I can go back to it again

Medusa snaps her fingers in front of my eyes and my memory trip stalls

"Don't you doubt yourself, Nova. You are more than this" Medusa's tone calms down as she tilts her face to look into my eyes

"I love him Medusa, I love Andrew" I say while thinking, "I want a second chance at life by marrying him"

"NONSENSE!" Medusa gets up, this is the first time I have seen her getting frustrated, EVER.

"You are a phenomenal woman, you are not meant to be someone's wife or mother of his kids. You are a warrior with a heart of Queen. Don't let your existence go to waste." she continues

"You are more than a pretty face or a curvy body, your life means much more than heartbreaks or parties. It doesn't matter who is with you as long as you are with you because you are enough. You are more than enough. Any man would kill for a woman like you because you... you Nova, you don't realize what a bright star you are. You doubt yourself, you cry to sleep, you hesitate at every step and you ruminate about what he or she or them would say about you. Behind this little scared girl is a ferocious woman who is waiting to be let loose, waiting to roam the jungles that are meant for her. For once look at me and say you are just here to be a wife, mother or a sex object. Tell me." She exclaims and I am spellbound

"You are kind, you are funny and what matters is that you are intelligent and gifted beyond measures. You are a mix of sun and moon but still you doubt, still you fear and still you wish to settle which is way below what Gods have made for you. Why do you do this?

 Why do you hinder your potential or dull or colours to blend in the black and whites of the world 

You are art Nova. Pure art and you need and artist to understand you.To make sense of all that you are. 

"Don't do this, Please" She says and sits next to me again

I look at her and my soul feels like it's on fire, I cannot do this. I cannot settle. I will fight for a better life and a better me as long as I have blood in my veins.

This is me, the real me

"Just as I knew, It happened" Andrew smirks while standing at the door and taking a bite from a red apple

"You both, I knew it" He scoffs

"I have changed my mind, I want to go back to the castle" I say as I wipe my tears off

"No" Andrew says expressionlessly

"What?" I ask

"I said No" He says with mundane expression

"I am not your wife and I will never be. You cannot force a royal to do something they don't wish to do. It's treason" I say while standing up in anger as does Medusa

Andrew Scoffs and says "Awww, poor you!" 

As he says those words 5 big men with swords emerge from the door as Medusa hides behind me

Andrew laughs and say, " I knew you would do this. This mad lady will brainwash you and you will fall for it", "Warrior? More than just a sex object?" Andrew laughs like a mad wolf and then his mood changes to anger

"Wear this" He throws a white lace dress towards me, "We are getting married right now" he keeps eating the apple

"No, I won't" I throw the dress to the floor

"You cannot force me to marry you, you double faced pig!"

He looks at me with a shocked face and then say, "Take the mad lady"

3 men step towards me and snatch Medusa away from my arms, I resist as much as I can but to no avail. They throw me to the side and take Medusa away and place her near the fireplace

"Wear the dress or I will burn her skin with this" Andrew says as he takes out a hot metal rod from the burning fireplace and raises it into the air

I am numb, Medusa shivers in pain but says "Don't worry about me Nova. Just run!" 

But I can't move, I cannot leave her and I cannot run. I am tired of running.

"5..4..." Andrew begins his countdown as he sways the rod in the air 

"I will go and change" I say meekly as I cannot fathom putting Medusa through so much pain

"No you won't!" Medusa scream and one of the man slaps her

"No please don't hurt her!" I say as Andrew turns towards me with animated expression

"I will go and change" I say and turn

"No, you change here. In front of us" He laughs as the men join in and I feel the most humiliated I have ever been.

I swallow my pride and look back at Medusa,  who is lipsing the words "NO" and shaking

I start to undress..

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