𝓦𝓮𝓭𝓭𝓲𝓷𝓰 𝓹𝓪𝓻𝓽 1

110 38 17
                                    

𝘼𝙗𝙪 𝙃𝙪𝙧𝙖𝙞𝙧𝙖𝙝 (𝙧.𝙖) 𝙨𝙖𝙞𝙙 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙬𝙝𝙚𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙋𝙧𝙤𝙥𝙝𝙚𝙩 (𝙥𝙗𝙪𝙝) 𝙘𝙤𝙣𝙜𝙧𝙖𝙩𝙪𝙡𝙖𝙩𝙚𝙙 𝙖 𝙢𝙖𝙣 𝙤𝙣 𝙝𝙞𝙨 𝙢𝙖𝙧𝙧𝙞𝙖𝙜𝙚 𝙝𝙚 𝙨𝙖𝙞𝙙:
بَارَكَ اللهُ لَكَ، وَبَارَكَ عَلَيْكَ، وَجَمَعَ بَيْنَكُمَا فِي خَيْ

"𝙈𝙖𝙮 𝘼𝙡𝙡𝙖𝙝 𝙗𝙡𝙚𝙨𝙨 𝙮𝙤𝙪, 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙢𝙖𝙮 𝙃𝙚 𝙨𝙚𝙣𝙙 𝙗𝙡𝙚𝙨𝙨𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨 𝙪𝙥𝙤𝙣 𝙮𝙤𝙪, 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙢𝙖𝙮 𝙃𝙚 𝙪𝙣𝙞𝙩𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙗𝙤𝙩𝙝 𝙞𝙣 𝙜𝙤𝙤𝙙."

وَخَلَقْنَاكُمْ أَزْوَاجًا 
"𝘼𝙣𝙙 𝙒𝙚 𝙘𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙩𝙚𝙙 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙞𝙣 𝙥𝙖𝙞𝙧𝙨" (𝘼𝙣-𝙉𝙖𝙗𝙖 78:8)

As I lay there thinking things over that night, my mind constantly replays the twinkle in his forest green eyes, or the way they sparkle when he's focused on something, like convincing me to become friends with the girl he's interested him. Yet stupidly I agree to it, like what was I thinking. Even just imagining him with this girl Laila, that was her name I believe, just makes it all too real. I don't know what I was hoping for but no one guaranteed me he was ever going to be mine. I need to stop this foolishness.

Uhh why is life so difficult sometimes. Astagfirullah, I shouldn't be having these feelings, not only is he Hussein's best friend but Uncle also took him under his wing after his farther passed away (inalilahi wainalilahi rajiun). Don't think they would understand, plus I wouldn't want to make this into a issue and ruin their relationships. I wish I wasn't feeling like this, I don't even understand it myself.

Subhanallah, he doesn't even enter my mind, but lately whenever he's near my stomach gets fluttery. For some odd reason I just become shy and withdraw into myself, wanting this uneasy feeling to go away or just hide. Silent hot tears trickle down my face and are absorbed by my pillow. I just sigh frustratedly, how could I let myself get like this. I just pray that the Almighty eases the pain and helps me see sense.

𝒜𝓁𝓁𝒶𝒽 𝓀𝓃𝑜𝓌𝓈 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝓌𝑜𝓇𝒹𝓈 𝓎𝑜𝓊 𝒸𝒶𝓃𝓃𝑜𝓉 𝓈𝒶𝓎, 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝓅𝒶𝒾𝓃 𝓉𝒽𝒶𝓉 𝓃𝑜 𝑜𝓃𝑒 𝓀𝓃𝑜𝓌𝓈 𝒶𝓃𝒹 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝓈𝑜𝓇𝓇𝑜𝓌𝓈 𝓉𝒽𝒶𝓉 𝓃𝑜 𝑜𝓃𝑒 𝓈𝑒𝑒𝓈.

اَلَا يَعۡلَمُ مَنۡ خَلَقَؕ وَهُوَ اللَّطِيۡفُ الۡخَبِيۡرُ

"𝙃𝙤𝙬 𝙘𝙤𝙪𝙡𝙙 𝙃𝙚 𝙬𝙝𝙤 𝙘𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙩𝙚𝙙 𝙣𝙤𝙩 𝙠𝙣𝙤𝙬 𝙃𝙞𝙨 𝙤𝙬𝙣 𝙘𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣, 𝙬𝙝𝙚𝙣 𝙃𝙚 𝙞𝙨 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙈𝙤𝙨𝙩 𝙎𝙪𝙗𝙩𝙡𝙚, 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝘼𝙡𝙡 𝘼𝙬𝙖𝙧𝙚?" (𝙎𝙪𝙧𝙖𝙝 𝘼𝙡-𝙈𝙪𝙡𝙠 67:14)

The next couple of days go by so fast alhamdulilah, as I buried myself with preparation for the Nikkah, trying to keep my mind occupied. First me, Naseeba, Shamsa and Habiba went shopping for dresses to wear to the wedding. Who would know trying on so many dresses can be exhausting. Then we head to Sephora to pick up a new foundation and some skin care products. Nothing like a bit of retail therapy.

We stop to eat at our favourite spot, alhamdulilah the food is delicious as always. We head home and start to decorate the house, since Naseeba decided to throw Jamilia ( Hussein's soon to be wife) a surprise bridal shower. She left the job of invitations to Jasmine, Jamilia's sister as she knows her friends and family better.

Two souls reunitedWhere stories live. Discover now