outsider [h.s]

27

Harry's POV

I open my eyes to only have everything from yesterday come crashing down, wishing that I could fall back into a deep abyss as I think about it more and more.

Rose was shot.

She may not be able to have children.

I nearly turn over and scream into my pillow, refraining due to the fact that Hunter lies asleep in the bed across from my own.

The smell of pancakes cooking is the only thing that encourages me to get up, changing into clean clothes after taking a very much needed shower before making my way into the house above.

Martin stands in the kitchen, cooking as a radio plays music softly. He hums along to it, seeming to know the song playing by heart. When he knows of my presence he smiles, "good morning Harry, I believe Rose is up and waiting to see you."

I absentmindedly smile, "I guess I'll go see her then." I say to him before going to the room I left Rose in yesterday. She lays on the bed, wearing a clean white shirt, all the blood from yesterday seemingly erased from her body. Her eyes lock on mine as I walk to her bedside, a small smile tugging at her lips.

"Well aren't you a sight for sore eyes." She says, still sounding tired but not as weak as yesterday.

"And so are you, actually wearing a shirt, huh?" I ask her with a laugh, sitting down and taking her stray hand between mine.

"They just gave it to me about an hour ago, I hear it's designer." She says jokingly with the cutest grin I've ever seen.

"It looks it." I say with a genuine smile, happy with how light hearted she is being. "So, how are you feeling?" I don't know what the state of her wound is but she isn't acting effected by it which is good.

"It's not that painful with all the medicines they have me on, and Martin said that I'll be able to walk in a week or so if it continues to heal well." She seems happy with the news, "want to see it?"

"Are you really going to gross me out with your battle scars right now?" I ask, but it's too late and she's lifted her shirt, beneath is nothing but a faintly red bandage.

Actually seeing her wound brings up Martin's revelation in my mind, and I suddenly feel as if I may be ill.

"Harry are you okay? You look like you're going to throw up, I didn't know blood did that to you, I'm sorry." Rose says innocently, and I automatically know that I must tell her.

"It's not that, I have something that I have to tell you." I gulp down all the emotions building up, and when Rose encourages me to go on I can't help but starting to feel horrible for what she's about to learn. "Where the bullet hit you, it... You may not be able to have children." I say, not knowing any other way to put the devastating news.

Rose's eyes are filled with tears as she mulls over my words, and I'm sure mine look the same as a tsunami of emotion comes over me.

"Are they sure?" Is all she asks, gripping my hand as she waits for her fate to be made truth.

"They're pretty sure, but are going to run tests to be positive." I tell her before wiping my eyes with the sleeves of my sweater.

"I feel like I'm mourning a life that never happened." She says with nothing but grief in her voice, tears sliding down her cheeks.

"We're going to find a way Rose, alright? I know it won't be soon, but I don't care if it takes until we're way too old to raise kids to find an alternative. Whoever shot you may have taken away your ability to become pregnant, but that doesn't mean you can't still be a mother." I say with the upmost sincerity, meaning ever word that leaves my mouth.

"Will you still want to be with me, even if I can't have kids?"

"Of course I do, I'm always thinking about our future together babe." I say before continuing, "during the beginning of training you were so confident and had the nerve to talk back to me, which was slightly unnerving since I was the instructor, you the student. Then as time went on I seemed to open my eyes to who you were, and I started to fall for you with no turning back it seems. So please don't have a doubt in your mind of the way I feel about you, because I'm afraid I may never stop."

She seems to take a sigh of relief after knowing where I stand, "bring Martin in here please, I want to have the test done."

"Are you sure?" I ask, not sure if she's ready to find out what we may already know.

She nods with certainty, "yes, if I can't have children I'll still have you, and that's all I need."

-

Martin and I sit in the living room, the multiple tests he did on Rose done over half an hour ago. He says it will take a few days to get the results seeming as he has to process it through the government, basically using his contacts to get it done.

"That's a strong girl in there, you know that right?" Martin says to me, causing me to look up from the book I'd just started reading.

"I knew it since the moment I met her," I say simply.

"With a mentality like hers she could help you through anything Harry, keep her close while you still can."

I can't help but be curious, "did you have someone?"

"Her name was Margaret, we got married when we both turned twenty, the government chose for us to be together of course, maybe one of the only things they've ever done right." He speaks from memories, and I can tell they bring him joy from the smile on his face.

"What happened to her?" I ask, no women living here when we arrived.

"The government suspected her of being an outsider, then followed her one day to go through with the lead. I found her outside of this house shot, barely clinging onto life. She died in my arms, her gun still in her hand from trying to fight back against them." You would think his eyes would fill with sadness, but instead they show absolute anger. He wants vengeance against the government, not just because of how they run things, but also for his late wife.

"They'll get what's coming to them Martin, you deserve justice probably more than the rest of us." I say, not able to imagine the pain and anger he still feels to this day.

"As do you Harry." He says with a knowing look, and I'm suddenly confused.

"How do you know?"

There shouldn't be any documents, no files for what happened all those years ago. These people shouldn't know where I come from, they should just know me as Harry, the guy who trained initiates, nothing more.

"We keep copies of all records, but don't worry, I can assure you Chris and I will keep the information private, no need for the people in this organization to think different of you." He winks, keeping my secret safe for me.

"Thank you, I appreciate that." I say, a weight suddenly lifted off my shoulders.

If anyone within the outsiders found out who I truly was I would be impacted in more ways than one, and I can't have that happen.

______________________________

guys I fail so many tests lol I hate high school

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