eidolon | kim taehyung

• six •

"so, h-how was school, huh?"

she jumped slightly at the voice, timidly putting her backpack on the floor.

it was her mother,

holding two bowls of instant ramen, instead of a soju bottle, for a change.

"fine," she spoke quietly, afraid of how her voice sounded when she said the word. and oh, how she hoped to herself that her tone wasn't high or disrespectful, and that she didn't sound different, or afraid, or rude—

"take this and, put it there," she handed her the warm bowl of noodles and sloppily pointed at the dinner table, and she followed instantly and took the bowl carefully, setting it on the tabletop.

she stood and watched her mother sit and take her chopsticks, and the woman stared back at her, startling her lightly.

"sit. eat." she said firmly, so yesul sat down, taking a soup spoon and sipped the broth a little bit too quickly,

so the spicy liquid hit the back of her throat the wrong way, causing her to fall in a coughing fit. the woman was alarmed, leaning forward immediately to rub her back, "are you alright?" and yesul nodded, though still letting out a cough of two after.

"too hot?" the woman asked, "i thought the water made it too bland the first time so i put some salt and a few other spices," she tucked a tuft of her curly hair behind her ear.

"s-sorry, your mom doesn't cook as well as she used to," she smiled emptily, staring at the bowl.

yesul's eyes widened slightly, and upon hearing it, she took the bowl closer and started to slurp the noodles quickly, putting the bowl to her lips and sipping some of the soup.

the woman was startled, but laughed lightly at the girl after a while, "hey, eat slowly! you're gonna suffocate on the noodles again if you eat that fast." she giggled, and yesul put down the bowl, a tiny smile forming on her lips.

"wipe your mouth!" she scolded her jokingly, tossing a napkin at her.

yesul caught the tissue in her hand, smiling softly at the woman.

there she was.

"it's really good, mom,"

that was her mother.

"th-thank you, for the food." she said shyly.

then it became silent for a while, the both only eating a few more bites of the noodles before finishing the meal.

"give me that. i'll wash up now." the woman broke the silence, extending her hand to retrieve the porcelain bowl in front of her. "and drink some water. too much ramen isn't good for you."

"leave it to me, mom, i'll wash them." she insisted, but her mother clucked her tongue and shook her head. "just give it to me, quickly." she spoke strictly.

yesul looked at her before reluctantly pushing the bowl towards her, and she stood up from her seat, watching the woman open the tap and fill the room with the sound of running water and utensils clacking in the sink.

"who were you talking to outside?" the woman asked.

"t-taehyung," yesul replied timidly.

"who's that?" the woman's eyebrows knitted together. "i don't know that name."

the girl looked blankly at the coffee table in front of the couch in their living room, empty bottles of what yesul assumed was beer filling the space,

of course you don't know him. that's why.

"when did you really bother to know, anyways?"

"what did you say?"

the bowls clanged loudly against the metal sink, the running water coming to an abrupt stop.

yesul bit her tongue.

i-it slipped out,

she didn't mean to say that.

did she?

"how dare you?" the woman stormed into the living room, and yesul's heart thumped to the sound of her mother's loud footsteps.

"you need to watch that mouth of yours, yesul." she scowled, feeling her mother's fingers dig deeply into her lip, eyes watering at the pain.

"how dare you say that to your own mother?! huh?"

and it was the morning all over again, like a broken tape replaying over and over,

yesul grew sick of it.

"i'm trying to be a mother for you! i've done everything for your sake and this is how you repay me?!"

"mom, i didn't mean it, okay?!" she screamed.

"it hurts! s-stop, being like this, mom." she sobbed, lips quivering. "i love you, okay? i-i don't want you to be like this. i-i just want my," she sniffed,

"i just want my mom back."

the woman scoffed, "this is your mom, yesul. what are you gonna do about it?"

she sobbed.

"this isn't her."

she shook her head, eyes tired of crying.

"but she's there. i know it."

she closed her eyes, turning around and climbing the stairs to her room.

"yesul, come back he—"

she shut the door loudly.

she'll be right there.

as promised.