･• BROKEN •･

8. The Company

Next day, Jin went to see Bang Sihyuk. He wanted to talk to Jin.
They meet in Sihyuk's house. Though, meeting in his house wasn't usual. Jin sat on the sofa and said: It's a pleasure to see you, sir.
Sihyuk put a cup of coffee on the table for Jin, then sat in front of him and said: you too. It's been a while... I wanted to talk to you about the group.
He showed Jin some papers and said: read them.
Jin started to read. Every paper was about BTS, with a negative title... one of them was "falling". He said: why are you showing them to me?
- good question!
Sihyuk got closer to Jin and said: I'm sure you know how you're doing these days, don't you?
Jin asked worriedly: what... do you mean?
- I think you weren't doing well early. Is there any problem?
- No sir...
- do you have any problem in your personal life?
He wanted to say yes, he wanted to shout everything out and say the truth, but something didn't let him...
- No...
- then, what's wrong with you? I know you're a really good singer. You tried so much to be in this place, but now, you're giving in!
- No sir! I'm not giving in! I...
- don't explain your faults to me! I appreciated your efforts until now, but if you continue doing like this, you'll take the group down.

Take the group... down?

- even in this time we're talking together, some news agencies are trying to publish some bad news about BTS. In so many surveys and comparisons, BTS is coming down. I'm serious, there are many talented boys waiting to be a member of BTS!

His last sentence, scared Jin a lot...
- you know it Seokjin, your entrace to this group was accidentally, wasn't it? We just wanted you because of your face. There are even more handsome boys out there! With even better VOICES!
Jin was under the pressure... he didn't want to hear his voice anymore...

- just make sure you won't fail anymore! I heard something about you, that you weren't practicing and singing well earlier. But I forget it this time. Just this time! So... what do you say now?

What can I say, when you ruined me like this?...

- I'll do my best, I promise...
- We'll see, Kim Seokjin...

Jin went out of Sihyuk's house. He was thinking about being in the group... he didn't want to hurt bts... he just wanted everything to stop, or to be over soon...

I'm such a mess... I'm ruining all they have done till now... I don't want to hurt them anymore...

He went back to his home. They wanted to go out for dinner that night. He didn't know he wanted to go or not...

I can tell them everything and finish it all... I don't want to take the group down...

He was thinking about their works. They had an interview coming soon, a concert in China and a fan meeting next. They had so much to do... and everything was managed. He was thinking about it, but his phone rang. It was Jungkook.
Jin: yes, Kookie?
Jungkook: Jin hyung, where are you?
- home. Why?
- don't tell me you forgot about the dinner!
- no I...
He looked at his watch. It was 7:12 p.m. He wasn't careful about the time...
Jin: sorry I was busy I forgot the time.
Jungkook: busy? Come on!
Jin heard Namjoon's voice saying: give me that phone__
Then he heard it properly: Listen busy boy, you'll be here until 8:00, or I'll kill you!
Jin laughed.
- are you laughing? Am I a joke to you Mr. Kim?
- of course you're not!
- then run as fast as you can!

Jin finished the call and ran to get a taxi. But there was no taxi there. He had no choice but to run... he ran but not very fast, since it was dangerous for him. He had to get to the restaurant. After 30 minutes running, he arrived there. He was gasping.
Namjoon said: Hello, Mr. busy!
Jin said: am I on time?
Namjoon: yeah... it's 7:42.
Jhope said while clapping: good job~!

They sat on the table and ordered foods. Jin wasn't hungry, he was forcing himself to eat. If he didn't, they would become suspicious on him. After the dinner, they started to drink. Everyone were careful not to get drunk, but Jin wasn't. He just wanted to drink, just to put out the fire inside him... he even didn't know what he wanted to do, he didn't know how he was feeling; Angry, sad, hopeless... he was feeling nothing, but empty...

- Jin?
- Hey! Wake up!
- told you not to drink too much...