Dear Craig Tucker {Completed/Being Edited}

Chapter 4: I Lost You

I ran down the hallways at full speed towards the boys bathroom. I could feel the hot tears stream down my face nonstop like a long rapid stream and down dripped past my chin and down onto the floor behind me as I ran.

As I ran people stopped and stared at me with judging questioning eyes asking me metal questions. I could hear them too. I covered my ears with my hands and ran blindly threw the hallways.

I ran into the bathroom, slamming the doors open. Luckly no one was there. It was deserted. I opened one of dark green bathroom stall doors and slipped in lock to the bathroom door behind me it clicked into place. I placed my feet in front of me and sat down on the toilet sighed deeply.

I brought my knees forward and hugged my knees and cried onto my jeans. My knees stabbed my eyes and I sobbed it echoed around the bathroom stall. I was worried someone would hear me but I didn't care and I couldn't stop crying.

The tears streamed down my face and I cried and cried and cried. Cried because I lost my Tweek. I had lost everything I had ever loved in my whole life. All my life had worth living.

I cried because I had no one. No one wanted to be there for me. No one wanted to help me. Or even try to help me. I placed my feet down on the tile bathroom floor in front of the toilet I was sitting on. I skimmed my black vans along the surface tile foor swinging them back and forward.

I sighed and feeling the hot tears running down my face I reached deep into my navy blue basketball shorts and produced out a small tiny blade. It shimmered and I could see my reflection in the light reflecting off the matalic and inticing blade.

I gripped the blade tightly between the two fingers on my left hand and rolled up my sweatshirt sleeve and hovered and paused for a moment right above my right wrist. The tears countiued non stop to stream down my dark face and I then gritted my teeth tightly and sliced a tiny insition on my right wrist.

I flinched and felt a tiny trickle of blood drip down my wrist. I could feel more tears drip down my swollen pink cheeks and onto my navy blue pull over sweatshirt. I brought the blade down again and sliced my wrist again and again and again. Blood dripped onto the floor.

I felt woozy and finally stopped and stared down at my wrist and almost called out loudly in pain. I shrieked. My bloody scars were smeared and ran down to amost my elbow.

I placed the bloody blade back into my basketball shorts where it lived practically and wiped the tears from my red swollen eyes with my thumbs and paused taking a long deep breath before I cautiously swung open the bathroom stall door.

I looked both ways before I walked over to the mirror and stared into the mirror. The in the mirror was myself staring back at myself as if mocking me, laughing at me silently without emotion.

My eyes were red and puffy. I had big black bags that hung low underneath my deep Blueberry Blue eyes. I gripped the sides of the white glass sink tightly and felt the tears coming on again but I sucked them back in again barely.

This is not what I pictured myself when I was a kid or even a couple years ago.

I sighed and turned on the cool warm water from the focet and braced myself before I quickly shoved my bloody wrist underneath the focet in the sink. The stinging was intence and I stabbed my nails into the sink only doing damage to my nails and not the sink obviously.

When my wrist was not as bloody as it was before I shut off the focet, washing the blooted out droplets of water and took a brown paper towel and rubbed my wrist dry.

I turned around not facing the sink ready to exit the Bathroom door and go to my next class. I saw the bathroom door swing open and in the door way stood a surprised and shy and embarrassed Tweek.

Tweek looked away at the tile floor and then looked up noticing my wrist. We were now closer than an inch facing each other face to face. Almost nose to nose touching.

Tweek covered his tiny mouth and stared down at my wrist again. HIs coffee brown eyes filled up with tears and his jjittering stopped, he stood still for the first time in a while and tears silently rolled down his perfect rosy pink supple cheeks.

"Craig.....?" He silently whimpered at me. I could feel my tears coming again and I slipped past him and ran out of the bathroom. Leaving him behind. I could hear him rush out of the bathroom after me and yelled to me loudly. He was sobbing and I could hear the pain in his voice and in every word and painful agonizing breath.

"Craig! C-come Back!" He yelled to me. The first words he had said to me in a while. I ignored him and felt another set of tears roll down my cheeks and dribble down my chin. I blingly ran threw the locker clautrophobed hallway. I felt the tears roll down my cheeks and I ran as far away from the one I loved.