Bloom

33. unknown information

Haven

I couldn't stop smiling, the happiness that was flowing through my body was comparable to the tiny waves that appeared, out of nowhere, in the lake that was in front of us. Every time I glanced at him, my lips would curl up naturally.

His soft- spoken voice, though, naturally deep, made me love the way he had opened up and talked so much. I could listen to him for hours. His simple way of speaking, even though I knew his mind went much deeper at times.

I didn't know where he had gotten the courage from to speak so much, but I'd hoped he would always feel this way around me from now on. I couldn't get enough of his speaking and stories, his elaboration when it came to his autism.

We'd been quiet for a while now, both silently enjoying the crisps. Our hands touched sometimes, I couldn't deny the same old flutter that would appear in the pit of my stomach. I couldn't really understand why it was already present.

Sometimes he would reach down for the straw and take a sip of the iced coffee, his hands in his lap as he, apparently, didn't like touching the cup. It would make smile, it would make me feel warm, just to see how pure he was at the moment, how he was himself.

He sometimes swallowed his crisps down while his lips were parted, muscles in his face would pull slightly, his eyes staring into the greatest unknown. I wondered what he was thinking about, because as soon as he got lost into it- he'd only come out of it minutes later.

"Buddy," I whispered to Cooper, who immediately started to lick my hands, making me chuckle. "He's such a sweetheart."

Zephaniah looked down at his dog, smiling. "Yeah."

"Must be nice to have him around you, when you don't have siblings, yeah?" I wondered, looking up at him.

Zephaniah nodded, the brightness of the sun onto the lake, reflecting in his green eyes. He swallowed, then fiddled with his hands. His right one eventually managed to flap a few times, I wondered if I'd made him uncomfortable.

Please, not now. It was going so well.

Suddenly, he took something out of the pocket of his jacket, staring at it. "Haven I- I'm sorry, I lied." He stammered, not making eye contact.

"What do you mean?" I wondered, frowning slightly.

He laid something down onto my leg, pulling at his fingers as he nervously played with them. "I said- I said I didn't have a sibling but.. but mum is pregnant."

Carefully picking the ultrasound up, my eyes lingered on the photo for a while, a small smile playing on my lips. "Precious," I whispered, staring at the baby, that was still so little. "You didn't know, Zeph. Why would you say you lied?"

Zephaniah stared up at the sky, his tongue rolling over his upper lip. "Because it had been there?"

"But you didn't know." I said, my voice becoming softer. Was he actually thinking he lied, just because the baby had been there when he didn't even know it yet? How much did he overthink? It made me feel slightly sad, how would he ever go to sleep at night with his thinking?

Zephaniah shook his head, still fiddling with his fingers. His eyes lingered onto the ultrasound, his expression turned slightly melancholic, it made me wonder why. "So, this is why Hannah- your mum was sick?"

He nodded and briefly glanced at me, "They could not tell earlier, it was too early, mum said."

"Yeah, perhaps." I answered slowly, brushing my finger over the slightly crooked photo. Probably from being in his jacket for a while. "Do you like it? That you're getting a brother or sister? I've always wanted a little brother or sister!"