In the Shadows

What Happens in the First Trimester

Now that I've decided to keep the baby and know what the rest of the year will look like, I start to settle in my new home. Every time I start to feel guilty about crashing here Clint and Laura make it a point to show me that I'm welcome. I woke up really early in the morning because it's still drilled into my mind that it was time to train. As I walk out of my room I run into Laura. "Sorry about that. I wasn't watching where I was going," I say to her. She smiles at me and leads me to the kitchen table.

" Okay so I'm assuming you're new to this whole pregnancy thing because you are clueless on what happens during the 9 months you're pregnant," she states, " so I'm gonna let you in on a secret. During the first trimester you start to get morning sickness. I'm not sure why it's called that when it doesn't happen only in the morning but that's besides the point. There are certain foods that you will not able able to stand the sight or smell of. Sometimes the smells of foods will trigger the sickness and make you want to throw up". I love how she can drop so much information in a simple manner and still have me digest it. I nod showing her that I understand what's she's saying so she tells me that we're going to be starting a list for me- what makes me sick and what not. I tell her we can begin at breakfast and that I'm going to go exercise.

What I don't expect when I exit the house and go to the barn is to see Clint doing what I got up this morning to do.  "Hey, sis. What are you doing up? You're meant to be resting," he yells. I walk towards him and say, "Last I checked exercise is good for you. Especially during pregnancy. Let's spar. I haven't had a partner to do this with in a while".  At first Clint wasn't having it but then I called him a coward and we were back on.

After one hour of sparring and Clin teaching me to shoot arrows. Laura called us in for breakfast.  " So now that you're staying with us what should we call you?," Cooper asked. I paused at this question because I didn't know what my answe would be. "Uh I'm not sure. What were you thinking about calling me? Since you brought it up," I answer. Cooper then looks at Lila and then back at me and says, " We'll since you're basically dad's sister we were thinking Auntie Daisy". I choke on my orange juice that I was drinking while he said this and start coughing. After I get myself together I look at him with a smile and chuckled, " Yeah kid. That'd be nice". We're a smiling like idiots as we continue our breakfast.

The kids go off to school and it's now me, Laura, Nathaniel and Clint at home.  Without being unaware I start cleaning the kitchen and Laura tries to stop me but I look at her and say, " I get that I'm a guest and you want me to feel at home and Laura guess what? I do, okay, I do feel like I'm at home please let me clean. I want to do my part". After I said this Laura backs away gladly letting me clean after I admit out loud, without them forcing me to,that this is my home. 

Laura then goes off to work, leaving me, Clint and baby Nate alone.  After Clint our Nate down for his afternoon nap we go sit out on the porch swing and I just look at him amazed. "How do you do it," I ask him. He looks at me confused so I continue, " How didnyou raise these amazingly smart and beautiful kids? How did you know you were going to be a great dad? Clinton I'm scared. I'm scared that I let this kid down. That I have to do this alone-," Clint cuts me off and full turns to my direction. He takes my hands and looks me dead in the eye. " First and foremost you don't have to do this alone. Laura and I will gladly help you. You're family no matter what. And secondly, no one is ever prepared to become a parent. Sure the are books on how to and things like that but nothing beats the real deal. I remember not wanting kids for a long time but as soon as Laura said she was pregnant I was beyond happy. Daisy, you will be a wonderful mother. You are not someone who backs down from a fight especially when it's something they believe in- I've know that about you since the day I met you and you were a baby. And you will always be scared but as soon as those baby is in your arms nothing else matters because you will love it more then anything in the world".

By the time Clint finishes his big speech, the weight on my shoulder is lifted. The way he can make me see things in a new light is astounding. We both get up and make the kids and after school snack so it will be waiting for them as soon as they come through the front door. I help Lila with her school work, let Cooper ask me questions when he needs help, and Clint is entertaining Nathaniel while the kids finish up their school work. By the time it hits 5pm Clint finally lets the kids play and Laura comes home. She rests while the kids play together and Clint starts preparing dinner. 7pm hits and it's dinner time. That's when they start to socialize.

Like a lightbulb going off in her head Laura turns to face me. " Oh I forgot to ask you this morning, how far along are you?," she asks. I shrug, indicating that I don't know. I mean I'm aware that I'm in my first trimester. How far along? I have no clue. I lean over to her and Clint while the kids aren't listening, " Is there any way to find out? You know without our old friends finding out? If there is I'm totally down," I tell them.

The married couple look at each other like they're searching for clues within each others minds. "I mean we could get it done at Tony's- we'll not Tony's specifically but maybe Stark Industries or the Avengers Tower," Clint vocalizes. Laura in agreement says, " I was thinking the Avengers Tower would be a good idea". They look at me and wait for my answer. I of course say yes because it's the best place where Coulson won't follow. Why? That's because he still hasn't told the other Avengers that he's still alive.

Clint nods and leaves the kitchen to quickly make a call to Tony, five minutes later he returns and sits down. " Okay so I talked to Tony and he said the best time he has is tomorrow morning around 9am. I took it because it was the only time he had and I told him the only way you'd go is if I was with you," He informs us.  I look at and ask, " So what exactly did you tell Tony? What time do we need to wake up?" Clint gives me a short answers to all of my questions starting with Tony was only told to bring multiple doctors and that Tony would pick us up in his private jet at 5am.  I'm starting to feel like odd days are gonna be what happens during my first trimester.