In the Shadows

A Jump Into The Future

It's been seven years since I left S.H.I.E.L.D. and since Lincoln died. But more importantly it's been six years since I gave birth to my baby boys, Andrew and Phillip. Ever since that appointment with both Dr.Young and Dr.Covey telling me that I had post-partum depression, I ended up having to contstantly have doctors appointments to monitor my mental and physical health.

That's also when I decided to take my doctors' advice and start keeping a journal that also ended up being a photo album of memories as well for the Johnson-Campbell family. Every time I wanted to call Coulson, May, Mack, Yo-Yo, Fitz and Simmons, I'd write everything I wanted to say with a photo as evidence so it could feel like they were here with me watching my kids grow up because even if I haven't spoken to them in years they're still my family too.

I didn't create the most healthy coping mechanism with my after birth blues. It wasn't only because I missed being in the same area as my team. After having the twins, it hit me more that Lincoln couldn't see how beautiful our babies were. How Andrew has dimples and how Phillip has his wild hair. I felt like someone still had to pay and that I needed to atone for his death.

So every few weeks I could go to L.A. and track watchdogs and try to help protect the Inhumans in the only way I can right now. No one knew I was doing this until the news caught wind of me and started calling me "Quake". I hated it. The only people who would know this was is my work is the team, Barton family, many people in Wakanda, and Captain America plus the Winter Soldier.

When I was with my kids I was a present and caring mom, like the one I wish I had and wished that JaiYing could've been. It was odd raising my kids in New York since I spent most of my time in California while I was alone, with the Rising Tide, and with S.H.I.E.L.D.

Tony the tin man offered me a job and I had to think about my babies so I worked for him under an alias which he didn't care about so long as he could spoil the twins rotten. It still amazes me that Tony Stark is my friend and likes kids (but hates teenagers). Pepper is an angel sent from above since she has to deal with Tony and is a huge help when it came to finding schools for the boys.

To make sure that they're safe, I always erase information that could lead to anyone know their existence and our location. When I go to California, both Bobbi and Hunter babysit their nephews. Sometimes I regret leaving the twins with them since Hunter always teaches Andy and PJ something odd.

My twins don't even know about our inhuman DNA. I'm not ready for them to learn about this whole other world that they're apart of. I haven't even told them about my whole past yet because they're too young to understand everything that I've gone through. I have told them about the team, how they're my family since I didn't get one growing up and what they're like. Bobbi and Hunter tell them about funny things that have happened on the base and during missions. It makes me smile so big to see their eyes widen in amazement.

This week I decided to go to California but not alone. I have to go check in on Polly and Robin due to the promise I made to Charles, Polly's husband and Robin's dad. I was planning on introducing them to my dad who's now a vet and doesn't remember me since he had his memories rewritten by the Tahiti project. Even though I'm not telling Andrew and Phillip who Cal is exactly, I thought it'd be nice for them to visit a pet shop and meet my dad without knowing.

When I told my sons that we were going on a trip, they were estatic. They even had a bigger reaction that we were going to a pet shop. It was so cute that I had to record it and keep it as a memory for myself and for them. 

It's their birthday soon and their favorite thing to ask me is how I met and fell in love with Lincoln. I can often see the sadness that they try to hide when they think about their father, how they wish they met him and how it would've been amazing to be raised by him. If only they could understand how I knew exactly what they're going through. They try to hide it so they don't hurt my feelings which breaks my heart more because even though I'm here for them, they're allowed to miss and wish for their father. I did.