Stonehearts 6: Alexandrite

Sixteen

"No." I whispered.

He blinked at me, his face ashen but surprised at the same time, "I'm sorry. I beg your pardon?" he asked but I know he heard me clearly.

"N-no." I said again.

Hindi ko maintindihan ang ekspresyon ng mukha niya, pero isa lang ang alam ko, nawala ang matamis na ngiti niya sa labi. Ilang beses niyang sinuklay ang buhok niya gamit ang kamay niya bago niya ako muling hinarap.

"I don't understand, Lexy." his voice was so soft that if I wasn't listening closely I won't hear it.

"Gio, kailangan mong maitindihan na hindi lang ako ang maaagrabyado rito kung sakali. I don't want to rush into anything especially now that my son is involved. We've known each other for what? Two weeks?"

"Nine years. Siyam na taon, Lex."

Inilingan ko siya saka ako tumayo. Sumandal ako sa dingding habang akap-akap ang sarili ko. The room suddenly felt small for the three of us that I needed to put some more space in between us.

"We don't, Gio. It's just one night and nothing followed after that."

The room was filled with deafening silence after that. I was looking intently at him but he was staring blankly at nowhere. Hindi ko alam kung anong tumatakbo sa isipan nya.

Nagalit ba siya? Na-disappoint? Will he choose to leave now? Sobrang daming kong tanong na hindi ko kayang sabihin sa kanya. The thought of him leaving is somehow a scary image to me. I started nibbling on my thumb when images of him saying goodbye crowded my head. My heart started to pound so fast and so loud it started to hurt so bad.

My eyes landed on my sweet boy who slept with a smile on his face. What if tomorrow there won't be any Gio? Paano ko sasabihin sa anak ko? My tears began to cloud my vision as more depressing ideas invaded my mind. I was slowly drowning with it that I didn't notice Gio standing in front of me.

Para akong naalimpungatan nang naramdaman ko ang mga hawak niya sa magkabilang braso ko.

"Hey, wifey. W-why are you crying?" napahawak ako sa pisngi ko saka ko tinignan ang daliri kong nabasa na ng luha, "Wifey, what's wrong?"

I shook my head. It's not that I don't want to tell him, the truth is I don't know why it terrifies the hell out of me thinking that Gio will be out of our lives for good because I chose to be cautious.

He bent down a little so he can see my tears as he wipes them with his thumbs. "No tears, wifey. No tears with me, please." he pleaded but it made me sob more.

Throwing all my reservations, I unpeeled my arms around myself and launched to hug him. The impact made him take a couple steps back but he didn't make me wait. Because as soon as I encircled my arms around his waist, his arms snaked around me too. With his towering frame, all six foot and three inches, my height only reached chest level.

"Are you leaving?" I asked with a hiccup when I finally found my voice.

"What?" napayuko siya para matitigan ako, "Who said anyting about leaving?"

Napakibit-balikat ako saka ulit binaon ang mukha ko sa dibdib niya. His familiar perfume invaded my senses and I don't mind if that's the only scent I'll recognize for the rest of my years.

"Lexy, wifey. Nag-iisip lang naman ako. I understand where you're coming from. You have a son and he's your top priority. Problema ko na kung paano ko papatunayan sa'yo that I ain't here for temporary. Lex, from the first time we met I've been clear of what I wanted from you and that never changed regardless the years we lost."