Gym Socks

Chapter 20

After the doctor radios I can tell by the expression on the doctors face Negan won't be around anytime soon. Perfect for me, I don't want to see his face anyways. I just wanna go back to my room and drown myself in my sorrows using every drop of booze I can find.

My heart is still heavy for Frankie. I'm beginning to realize nowhere is safe or good. Not Alexandria, not here, and sure as fuck not out there. This world has changed to an inhabitable environment. So the question is do I take another chance out there or do I do away with myself...

The thought of Frankie dying alone probably devoured by walkers sickens me. The fact she is probably up and around turned worsens how I'm feeling. All I can do is pray someone had the decency to put her out of her misery. If they did at least I know she's safe, there's a better place beyond this hell hole, beyond this life, I know it.

At this point I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place I'd take any group over this one, any one of them. Well except those disgusting men. But at least I learned something from them... I've learned that I am weak. That I can't fend for myself and the weak never thrive in this world. There's no place for them. I walk out of the infirmary and back to my room laying down on the bed. No more impulsive decisions I need to think this shit through. The only strength I have is my running and athleticism but no where near as strong as I need to be to take down grown men, especially when they have guns.

I just need to find someone who can teach me to fight a little and then I can book it. Find a new group. On my own this time. My entire mindset has switched and I will forever see the world in a new light.

After sleeping for God knows how long I awake to a sunrise. I roll myself out of bed and ignore the pounding headache, or at least attempt to. I have a glass of water to hydrate myself and then I am off to explore the compound. I remember Frankie had mentioned there were a few men who used to be personal trainers lurking in the compound. I just need to find one who can teach me some self defense.

I walk down to where a lot of people in the compound work out and train to stay fit. As soon as I enter the room I see tons of men who are two or three times my size. Honestly I feel like any one of them will do.

"Lost?" One of the men asks, he is much older than I am. He's not heavy but he for sure has muscle.

"Lost? No. I'm looking to learn. I want to learn to defend myself."

"Sounds like you found the right guy, I'm Mark."

"Brooke." I respond shaking his outstretched massive hand. I mean this guy is huge, I mean totally massive height wise. "When can we start?" I ask

"Right now if you want." He offers.

"Fine by me."

For the next two weeks I would train with Mark two times a day. I have yet to even see Negan since the incident. Hopefully he just gave up on me. Realized I'd never be the same after that, I'm now damaged goods. And that doesn't bother me one bit, in fact Mark turns out to be a really cool guy. He's not much of a talker. But we have some deep conversations together,  we do have one thing in common... we both hate it here.

Mark says he feels trapped living behind the gates, he wishes sometimes he could just take his chances and live out there but the thought of being alone scares him. He says he has never met Negan, only seen a glimpse of him and heard him momentarily since he's been here. But he doesn't think highly of him at all.

I tell him my story and how I lost Frankie and he listens to every word I say, he even agrees that it was Alexandrias loss for not coming for me and Negan's loss for treating me like garbage.

I try not to become too attached to Mark in fear I'll lose him or worse... try to bring him with me when I plot my next escape.

"You've improved." He mumbles.

"Been trying to practice for the past week or two. Finally think I'm ready to book on out and attempt to leave this place."

"Leave?" He asks

"Yeah. Leave. I'm gonna take my chances out there. See what else there is for me. Staying here has made me weak." I explain as he sits in silence for a moment or two running his hands through his long hair and beard.

"I'm joining." He simply says as I cringe.

"Absolutely not. I'm not gonna have anymore blood on my hands. I need to do this alone."

"I can help."

"Yeah how?"

"Protect..."

"I can protect myself. I've picked up this stuff quicker than a fly on shit. I can do it myself. I don't need anyone else to die."

"I'm going. End of it." He says as I sigh. Well he is strong and quick on his feet unlike Frankie was. Not that I thought of her as someone who would hold me back, but this guy has training and has been out there longer than both her and I were combined.

"Fine." I agree. "But we leave tomorrow at midnight, don't think I'll be waiting a second longer."

Sorry for not updating sooner, life has been crazy. But here's this update I wrote and I have a very specific direction on where this story is going to go and how it is going to end. I feel like some of you will love it and some of you not so much but we shall see! Any predictions?