The Bachelor: 10 Men 1 Stark (The Bachelor Marvel Au)

Purple.

you know i was gonna try and make this chapter like kinda good but nope lol its crack lol hopefully i dont l e a k this chapter um incase anyone cares, opal does still has the bear but she lost it. she also is making like headers or whatever theyre called so tell er shes doing a good job

"Hey, how's it poppin,' poppers?" Peter asked, walking into the crowded living room, holding the next date card.

"Never say that again." Sam said, walking across the room with a cup of coffee.

"Got it, sorry." Peter said quickly. "Okay, well tonight's date is, Painting with a Twist. Sadly I won't be there because I am underage and I'm afraid of drunk people, so I'm staying at my Aunt May's." 

"What do you mean you're afraid of drunk people?" Bucky asked.

"They scare me." (me too they succ)Peter said. The room just looked at him, unentertained or confused. "Whatever, you're leaving at 8 tonight."

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Steve sat painting a cherry blossom tree on a canvas beside Bucky, who had given up a while ago and now had patches of the colors he found to be prettiest and a large, black smiley face on his canvas. Bucky was trying to contort his body in a normal way to balance on the stool he placed closer to Steve to see his painting. Bucky had reached the cut off the company gave you and was drunk then, but was now downing Steve's share of alcohol as well. Steve was just glad they had rented the studio out for just them.

"I just think, it's so cool, how you can just, make stuff." Bucky managed to mutter out, starring at Steve's painting. 

"Ya, Buck," Steve laughed, "it's quite something."

Bucky was about to say something when he, and the rest of the room, was distracted by T'Challa standing on one of the cute, green, dainty, garden tables at the front of the room. He had a, still slightly wet, solid yellow canvas smashed over his head to about mid-forehead, rips facing upwards, and was announcing that he was 'a goddamn king and should be treated as one', but couldn't figure out what he wanted anyone to treat him with besides a warm blanket. (ok drunk people are a mood tho)

"YOU GO BAY-BEE!" a very, very drunk, Tony shouted from across the room, being held up by a slightly tipsy  Dr. Strange standing next to the bar and Quill sitting on it, heavily flirting with Tony. Rhodey was banging on laid out canvas's and paint cans with paint brushes, like drums and was accompanied by and an also drunk Sam who was dancing and rotating singing only the chorus' of 'I Want to Know what Love Is,' and 'Nothing's Gonna Stop Us Now,' out of breath, over and over again.

Steve leaned over to Thor sitting next to him, haven given up on his painting because he had to hold, a very chatty Bucky, up.

"I think I understand why Peter's afraid of drunk people now." 

"Me too," Thor was cut off by Bucky who had managed to keep his ass on his on stool but was laying his back across Steve's legs and hanging his head and arms upside down to look at Thor.

"Hahahahaha....you're hanging off the Earth like a bat. Ooh! You should be a super hero because you're all strong and stuff. YOU COULD BE BATMAN!"

"Buck, honey, he's already a superhero. Remember he has the hammer?" Steve said, gently down at Bucky, not bothering to try and explain the he was the one that was upside down. 

"Oh ya! Do you ever use it as a dildo? Just cause, like, you can move it with out touching it and not have to bend in these weird positions and your hand cramps. Uh it's so awful. Can you?" Bucky asked, wide-eyed and slurring his words. (where has this fic gone? i swear ill make the next chapter as least cracky as possible just to make up for this)