Grayson woke up before Ethan wondering why they were spooning on Ethan's bed, the last thing he remembered was doing shots and making out with someone. He removes his legs from Ethan's and looks at his hand, interlocked with Ethan's he smiles to himself before removing it and standing up.
Ethan's stirs in his sleep and mumbles a quiet 'Grayson' before falling back to sleep, Grayson puts on some clothes and looks back at Ethan who only had boxers on, did we? his thoughts ramble on and he didn't realise Ethan was waking up but before Ethan opened his eyes Grayson ran out of the room not wanting to confront him not knowing if they did anything last night.
He steps outside the rain soaks his hair immediately and he throws his hood up and stuffs his hands in his jacket pockets, he needs to walk he needs to breathe.
His chest feels heavy and tight, his veins flow with an indescribable emotion, he doesn't know why, all he knows is that whenever he's near him, his heart beats fast, his palms sweat and he finds himself staring for too long. The things is if he didn't initiate it the first and second time he probably wouldn't feel like this right now.
He finds himself at the local gay bar, he goes to every once in a while it's shut but he's good friends with the owner, he bangs his hands on the door and the manager walks up to the door frowning.
"What's the matter? why are you walking in the rain you dingus get in" his wrist is pulled and they walk up to the apartment above the bar and they sit down on the couch, Jonah grabs a towel for Grayson and wraps it around his shoulders only making his remember how Ben's coat was wrapped around Ethan.
"How do you know if you're catching feelings?" Grayson blurts and Jonah shrugs
"um... i don't know" He shrugs his shoulders,
"You're no help" Grayson stands up frustrated shrugging off the towel replacing it with the plain white hoodie given to him and his varsity jacket, he grabs his phone and runs out of the door pulling at his hair.
I AM NOT CATCHING FEELINGS. I AM NOT CATCHING FEELING. I AM NOT.
I can't we don't speak like at all, maybe that's because you've been too scared to be anything more, maybe thats why you hate him because you're catching feelings.
"Shut up"Grayson smacks his head trying to silence the voices in his head. "Shut up i don't, no i don't" Grayson sits down on the bench as the rain engulfs him, he continues to try and drown the voices.
He brings his knees up to his chest cradling them, his face rests on them and tears form in his eyes not because he's sad, more frustrated. He hates not knowing his feelings not being able to control them, he hates that since hooking up with Ethan it's made him question everything about him.
Every time i see him my stomach goes haywire, the butterflies in my stomach brew a storm,my heart climbs up into my ribs and up my throat but why?
He stays in the rain continuing to cry and overthink everything, he doesn't like him like that he just likes the way he makes him feel, how he has the best orgasms with him, he's addictive. He keeps telling himself hoping that he's right. He's convinced himself that's the only reason why he 'likes' him. So why does he hate him?
1. He's compulsive
2. He's loud and obnoxious
3. He thinks he smarter than Grayson (but he's not)
4. He shouts at Grayson for no reason
and 5. he reminds Grayson of himself.
The rain falls heavier and he sneezes, great i've caught something he thinks wiping his nose. The sky looks angry like it's ready to storm and Graysons gonna be caught in the middle of it all, he doesn't want to go back to the dorm just yet, he's not ready. He looks at the time only to realise he's been sat in the rain for 3 hours, 3 hours of being engulfed by rain and thoughts.
A black BMW pulls up next to him beeping his horn and rolling down the window, he sees Ethan ushering him to get in, Grayson shakes his head and protests, Ethan gets out of the car and walks over to Grayson his clothes are drenched they literally make him so much heavier when Ethan picks him up over his shoulder and drags him in the passenger seat.
"Put these on" Ethan reaches over to the back seat and pulls out his jumper and some joggers with some new shoes.
"No" Grayson declines Ethans offer
"Yes Grayson you could get sick" Ethan literally takes Graysons jacket and hoodie off revealing his pale skin from being in wet conditions for so long, Ethan looks at his abs but snaps out of his thoughts quickly going to unbutton Graysons jeans to get them off him but Graysons hand stops him and he's grateful he did that.
"Fine i can do it myself i'm not a baby" Grayson lifts his hips up taking his jeans off leaving him in boxers "You can drive" Grayson spits
"Not when you're moving around in my car" Ethan stares at Grayson putting his hoodie on, he snaps his head around when he starts to take his underwear off.
"Why were you even sat in the rain anyway?" Ethan lectures Grayson "You could have gotten sick"
"I don't care i'm already sick" Grayson sits down and lets out a huff of annoyance "Drive i wanna go home" Ethan nods starting the car
Ethans eyes rake over Graysons face, pale and his lips were almost sort of blue "You look dead" Grayson nods his head looking out of the window
"I know i feel it"
***
Word count: 987
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