Careful What You Wish For

Chapter 18- Grace

I sat in my room, getting high- by myself.

I sighed, tears streaming down my cheeks.

I hated this place now.

Page was dead, Jane was dead.

Gone. They were both gone and it was my fault.

I felt so empty.

I just wanted out.

I was so empty that I didn't even want to cut.

But, I did, desperate to feel something- anything. Anything besides numbness.

Then I remembered- none of this was real. It was all in my head. Nothing here was real. Nothing.

I remembered that in real life, Page was alive, desperate for me to wake up.

I wondered how I could get out.

If suicide would wake me up or just kill me in real life.

The lights began flickering, before stopping, leaving the room in complete darkness.

"What the-?" I stood up.

"Thinking of leaving, are we?" My dad's voice echoed ominously.

"I-" I started.

"You are." He interrupted.

"But-"

"You wanted a better life, you got it. No leaving. You got what you wanted."

"But- Page-"

"Hasn't anyone ever told you 'careful what you wish for'?"

"Yeah, but-"

A fist collided with my face, knocking me to the ground.

"Be grateful, bitch." He said in a near growl.

If I could see his eyes, I'm sure they would be full of hatred again.

His fist collided with my jaw again and he said "You ungrateful little bitch!"

"I-"

"Shut up!"

He punched me again.

He pressed a cold blade against my throat.

I closed my eyes in dread as he dug the blade into my skin.

And then it was gone.

The lights were back on.

I opened my eyes slowly to find myself alone in my brightly lit bedroom, pressed against the wall, near the cocaine and knife on the ground.

I looked in the mirror.

There was a small cut on my throat.

I began to hyperventilate.

I need to get the fuck out of here. Was all I could think.