~Brallon~ What About Me?!

What To Do

Dallon walks out, slamming the door. Brendon's knees go wobbly and he falls down to them.

He just sits there and cries. Brendon doesn't know what to do. What to stay. He just sits there. Brendon's heart is screaming to go after Dallon.

But Brendon gives up... he isn't going to go back... he isn't going to go get the love of his life...

His past lover deserves so much better, Dallon deserves someone who doesn't cheat, who doesn't lie, who doesn't fuck up.

Dal deserves someone beautiful, kind, loyal, pretty... pretty everything is what Dallon deserves...

What about us, Dallon had asked. Brendon made up his find about them.

He loves Dallon. With all his heart he does. But he knows he will just fuck up again and hurt Dallon. That's all he does. All he ever will do.

Even as kids, they were getting into fights with other people and one would physically get hurt. What if something like that happens again. They can't risk that.

Brendon doesn't want Dallon hurt. Dallon deserves someone to laugh with, to smile with, to be with.

But that person can't be Brendon... it won't be Brendon, it can't be Brendon.

He already let Dallon leave, Dal pretty much has his answer, Brendon wants nothing to do with him.

Brendon continues to cry, his mind is racing, he wants to go home. He wants to go back to his home... his house, Bren wants to lie in bed and just give up.

That's exactly what he's going to do. Go home and never leave home.

Brendon pulls out his laptop and starts searching for flights home. He finds one for tomorrow and takes it, he cancels his other plane ride and books the new one.

He starts packing, throwing all his stuff into his bag. He stuffs everything in and shuts it. Then he sit on the ground. He can't feel anything. Bren feels numb.

Tears still fall but he doesn't know how to feel, he can't even hear himself cry. All he feels is numb.

Dallon's last words to him were I love you.

Brendon leans against the wall and bangs his head on it a few times before stomping his foot and fidgeting.

The wolf boy stares at the clock, waiting for minutes to pass, even for hours to pass.

When he was with Dallon, days passed, months passed. Sadly... a year didn't pass. It would've if his mom never took him away. Took him away from the one thing he loves, the only thing literally keeping him alive, the only person who loved him and cared for him, gone...

Ever since that day, everything has changed, love of his life is gone, everyone had to pretend Dallon doesn't exist and of fucking course he believed it.

He forgot about Dallon. It is not Brendon's fault but it is eating Brendon up. His mind is telling him it's all his fault.

It's his fault his mom didn't want him.

It's his fault he stumbled into Dal's backyard.

It's his fault he got attached.

It's his fault he got hurt.

It's his fault his mom took him back.

It's his fault everyone stopped talking about Dallon.

It's his fault he forgot about Dallon.

It's his fault he cheated on Dallon.

It's his fault he was mad at Dallon.

It's his fault Dallon is gone...

It is all his fucking fault. He was never good enough, he made all these mistakes and never fixed them. Now Brendon is letting go of that.

He wants all of this drama gone. He wants his feelings gone. He just wants everything gone.

Brendon just wants to go home.

Home use to be with Dallon...

Brendon shakes his head sadly and gets up, instantly the room started to spin so he sits back down.

He shuts his eyes. All he can think about his Dallon, he tries to stop but he can't.

No one is here to stop him from talking about Dallon. No one at all.

He just wants to be in Dallon's arms, crying into his chest and telling Dallon how much he loves him.

But Brendon can't risk hurting Dallon like that again.

Brendon sits there, his tears stop but somehow continues crying. Still the numb feeling is there with him.

Soon his mind goes blank and he just stares at the floor, memories pop up in his head. Memories from old times together....

Like at the dog park...

"Pretty eyes, pretty nose, pretty lips, pretty face, pretty hair, pretty everything!" Dallon playfully rolls his eyes.

"I'm not that pretty," Brendon nods his head.

"You're right, you're beautiful."

Or that time at prom when they just made up in the corner...

Brendon smirks and attaches their lips. Dallon kiss back, Bren shoves his tongue into Dal's mouth but Bren lets out a squeak as Dallon changes their positions. Now Dal has him pinned.

Got kissed by someone Dal hate, Brendon beat his ass, now they're making out.

Prom could've been worse.

Or that time they went to the beach and Brendon three a fish...

Or that time they had detention with Tyler and Josh, they all drew tiny dicks on everything.

Brendon smiles sadly.

The four of them were really great friends... Tyler and Josh could always make Brendon smile. They were amazing friends.

More memories pop up.

The bubble bath, their first party together, the party at Gerard's, then they went home and fucked.

The time Brendon kept sending Dallon to the corner because he was "in trouble" because he was being mean.

Tears fall again, Brendon doesn't know if they are happy tears or sad tears. He misses the good days.

When he would protect Dallon and almost throw a chair at some stupid idiot because he was being a bitch to Dallon.

Then when they got home and Dallon iced his face and cleaned him up. He also remembers Dallon standing up for him against Dal's parents.

So many things have changed...

"Things have changed for me... that's okay... I... I feel the same, I'm on my way..." Brendon stands up and fans his stuff, he leaves the hotel room.