Coming Home

Cosima

'You alright?' I asked him, being busy with my cornflakes. It was Saturday and Ben had a day off, so we could have breakfast together what didn't happen that often.

'I'm okay', he said, nervously playing with his toast. Then he rose his eyes to mine.

'I'm really thankful for... for you being there last night. You know... It's just... you can't imagine how hard it is feeling alone sometimes. But I really didn't want to bother you with my prob...'

'Actually, I can.' I interrupted, withstanding his gaze.

'Yeah, I know, I'm sorry, I just... don't really know what to say.' He sighed and looked down on his plate again.

'Then don't. Ben... I want you to know I could have never done that without you. You didn't give up on me no matter how difficult it must have been with me. And I...'

I took a deep breath. I wasn't good at things like that.

'I am so thankful for that. You would really make a good dad. Not as good as mine of course, but you're not bad.'

I winked and he smiled at me.

'Thank you very much. You suck as a daughter.'

He put his tongue out, then started laughing at my pretended offended look.

'No, just kidding. You are a great human being. I can really understand why your father was so proud of you!'

I smiled while finishing my cornflakes.

'Anyway – I'm late. Gotta dash, we have a project at school and for no apparent reason they seem to want to finish that today.' Rolling my eyes I got up, shortly ruffling through his uncombed hair, because I knew that he hated that. I heard him complaining only half serious as I grinned and rushed out of the back door, pulling my hoodie up. There was a 'secret path' between some hedges I always took when I went to school by foot and didn't want to meet any paparazzi.

'Kira! Hey.'

I felt a finger tipping on my shoulder. Who the fuck could that be? I turned around, ready to yell some harsh words in whatever face might appear. But when I saw who it was, I wasn't able to say anything.

'Wait what, no insulting today?', Cosima laughed, seeing my confused expression. Why did she come back? I haven't even been nice to her last time.

Then I remembered that she told me about working in the lab. We headed there with our project, for it was the only part of school which was open on weekends.

'What do you even want?'

It should have sounded angry, but it ended up more like defeated. I was tired and wanted to go home. I had my part finished anyway and just pretended to still work on it, so the teacher didn't force me to help the others.

'Helping you to get out of here!'

Do I think loudly somehow?

She blinked and without a warning took my hand, dragging me to a back door and out into the schoolyard. We climbed up the oak and over the wall, so the teacher, just having her 'smoking-break', which actually seemed to mean making out with the facility manager, didn't notice us leaving.

I wasn't even sure why I was following her now freely, but there was something fun about it. Something different about her. I felt like I had no choice, but to just go along.

We made our way through some backyards and then crossed the street to the park, flying from a dog and the angry screams of his owner.

Arriving on the big field I could see from my window, we sank to the ground, out of breath and laughing like idiots. Some people passed by and gave us a strange look. We had to make a funny picture, her still wearing a white lab coat, me being covered under a black hood, we both lying on the ground.

'You want some of these?' Cosima asked, holding up a bottle with an undefinable liquid sloshing inside it.

'I don't even know what that is. Just stole it from your teachers table passing by, while she was picking up something from the ground.'

She put on the funniest look and I couldn't help but to start laughing again.

After a while she got up, putting the bottle back in the coat and then doffing it off. That's when I noticed how beautiful she actually was. She wore some dark red jeans with a loose pullover, showing an elaborate black and red swatch. Her hair were combed back to a ponytail. It looked so stylish, I even got a bit embarrassed of my own I-don't-care – outfit.

'What?' she asked smiling, and I blushed, realizing I had been staring at her.

'Nothing I... I gotta go. I think.' What is wrong with me???

'Oh, okay, sure.' She looked a bit disappointed, but helped me politely with getting back on my feet.

'You want me to take you home? I have a skateboard parked, just over there.', she joked and I grinned.

'No thanks, it's just... a few minutes walk from here.'

'Okay. Noon break on Monday, at the oak?'

I hesitated for a second, then I decided to make an effort.

'Yeah alright. Bye then. See ya Monday.'

'Great. Bye'

We both smiled and I turned around, making my way home.

When I arrived at the oak the next Monday, Cosima was already waiting for me. For a reason I didn't even know myself, I had been a bit afraid of that meeting. But this time I got a hug from her and it suddenly felt like we had known each other already for a long time.

From this day on we were best friends and to say the truth, she was my only friend, except for Ben of course, who had become like a brother for me. We met each day at the old oak, sitting on the branch and making fun of the other students in the yard. She gave me a feeling I thought I could never feel again: Happiness. Being with her just made me feel so happy and not alone.

It happened on a rainy day in October. The whole school seemed to have retracted into the building, so it took me a while until I had fought my way through the crowd and out into the rain. I pulled my coat tighter and ran towards the tree. Cosima was already sitting there, laughing with relief when she saw me.

'I was already afraid you wouldn't come' she said, while I climbed up and sat down beside her.

'Why wouldn't I?'

I chuckled, looking her in the eyes. She responded the look. Her eyes were beautiful, of a very dark brown.

I felt a bit strange, being caught in her gaze. Not in a bad way. Just in a being-scared-of-the-unknown – way.

'I don't know...' She whispered, coming closer. I could feel her breath on my face, sill not able to do anything. Then her lips touched mine, soft and light. I closed my eyes and she deepened the kiss. I didn't do anything against it.

When she pulled back I breathed heavily. My heart was racing and my head spinning. I didn't know what to think or to say.

As I didn't react there seemed some kind of fear flickering in her eyes.

'I'm sorry. I didn't...' She was looking for the right words.

'I didn't want to scare you off. Are you alright?'

'Yes I... I just... I need to think about that.'

'Sure, yeah, of course, just... take your time.'

She gave me a shy smile and it looked really cute. I just was so confused. I nodded and jumped off the branch, muttering a quick 'bye'. Then I ran through the rain, out on the street. I needed to get home.