Psycho

4

{Allison}

'So you didn't have sex?' Stacy asks.

'No,' I answer. I told her about my kiss with Evan. 'But I wanted to.'

'Oh, I get that,' Stacy laughs. 'He is handsome.'

'But what are you gonna do with Asher?' Stacy asks.

'I don't know,' I sigh. 'When I kissed Evan. It all felt so... different. It was as if my heart exploded. And there was passion from his side too. It felt nice. I don't have that with Asher.'

'Yeah, because he's boring,' Stacy says. 'And he's a dick. Break up with him already, please. It's not like you've been dating for years. It's only been two months.'

'Maybe you're right,' I admit. I don't feel the spark with Asher. And I'm sure I did with Evan. I really want to see him again, to kiss him again. He made me feel so good. And I know he respects me. Otherwise he would've gone for it.

I grab my phone and send Asher a text.

[9.06 PM]
We need to talk

[9.07 PM]
About what? Your kiss with that guy?

He knows? How does he know that? Who told him?

[9.08 PM]
I don't want to talk to you. It's over. I'm done with you and all your bullshit.

[9.09 PM]
It's not like you ever cared for me... It's fine. I'm done.

'He broke up with me,' I mumble.

'He broke up with you?' Stacy asks. 'What the hell?'

'He knows about my kiss with Evan,' I explain.

'Well, at least you're free now,' Stacy says, shrugging her shoulders. 'You did nothing wrong.'

'I cheated on him,' I sigh. 'That's wrong. But what's worse is, I knew what I was doing. I wanted to go even further. I just wanted to feel loved.'

'Allison, you're better off without him.' Stacy says. 'Believe me.'

'I need some time to think about everything,' I mumble as I stand up. 'I'm going back to my dorm.' Stacy nods and I walk out of her room.

In my dorm I let myself fall onto the bed. I feel worse about him breaking up with me than I expected. I still love him. I can't just turn my feelings off in a second. I wish I could.

Suddenly I hear a knock on my door. I stand up from my bed and open it. Asher stands in front of me. I feel my heart skip a beat.

'We need to talk,' he says and he walks inside.

'Why?' I whisper. 'You broke up with me.'

'Yeah, but I don't wanna lose you.' Asher sits down on my bed. 'I'm still mad at you though.' I really don't understand boys. I thought he was done with me. 

'I don't know if I can do this any longer,' I mumble.

'You don't know?' Asher hisses. 'You're the one who cheated! You should be happy I'm willing to give you another chance.'

'I shouldn't have kissed him,' I say. 'I know I made a mistake, but I-'

'Don't,' Asher mumbles. 'Don't hit me with the "but". Make a decision. I didn't do anything wrong.'

'You're right,' I whisper. 'I'm sorry.' Asher takes my hand and pulls me onto his lap.

'I love you,' he says.

'I love you too,' I tell him and I place a kiss on his cheek. I won't go further. He'll reject me anyway.

'Are you staying tonight?' I ask. He nods and wraps his arms around me.

'If you want me to,' he says.

'I could use some company,' I admit. 'It's cold alone.' Asher chuckles and slowly pushes me off his lap before he stands up. He takes off his shirt along with his shoes and trousers. Then he gets in the bed. I change into my pajamas and crawl in bed next to him. I cuddle up against him and he wraps his arms around my waist.

'Ash,' I mumble.

'Hmm?' he murmers.

'I don't wanna push things,' I start. 'But why don't you wanna... You know... Make love or something.'

'I do,' he says. 'Just not everyday.'

'We've only done it three times,' I say. 'In the two months we've been together.'

'We don't need sex to love each other,' Asher says. 'Right?'

'No, but... I don't know,' I say. 'Don't you have needs?'

'I only need your love,' Asher says. 'But I'm going to sleep. I'm exhausted. Goodnight.'

'Goodnight.' Soon Asher is fast asleep. I think Stacy is gonna slap me when she hears we're back together. She really detests Asher. I couldn't do anything else. Asher is right. I should be lucky he gave me another chance. Cheating is wrong. I'm in a relationship with Asher, and only Asher. I need to get Evan out of my head.

I turn around in Ashers arms and give him a small kiss on the lips before I close my eyes as well.